7 Things to Do to Have a More Peaceful Holiday Season.

I find it ironic that that during the holiday season the word peace is often used, but for many of us, this is the most hectic and stressful time of year.  In addition to life becoming very busy with shopping, parties, and events, it is also a time when emotions can be close to the surface. Many recall and feel the loss of loved ones more acutely at this time, and many people feel loneliness and alienation, regret or resentment. 

Our quest for personal transformation involves releasing old patterns that we habitually engage in during the holiday season that no longer work for us, and creating a new relationship with this time of year that allows us to have the experiences that we desire, whatever those might be.  I’m focusing on peace because I rarely hear people say “I’m much too peaceful this time of year.”

If you roll just fine with the holiday season, loving every minute of it, no need to read further. If, however, you feel you could and would like to have a more peaceful experience at the end of the year, then read on.
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Great Words for the End of the Year

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The words “go placidly amid the noise and haste” have been in my head recently. I googled them and discovered they are from a poem called the Desiderata (Latin: “desired things”) by Max Ehrmann. I was surprised to read on Wikipedia that when Adlai Stevenson died in 1965, this poem was found by his bedside, and that he had planned to use it in his Christmas cards. I pass it along as my holiday wish for you.

Desiderata 

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

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Wishing you Happiness,

Ted

I’m Grateful I’m Not A Turkey, 2011

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Here’s my gratitude list for 2011, you can click here if you’re interested in reading my 2009 list.

I’m grateful:

  • that my feet aren’t any bigger than they are. (Give me a break, I’m just getting warmed up here…)
  • that my wife is a good cook.
  • that in spite of that I still look kind of skinny.
  • for my wife who loves me and has my back.
  • for my six year old who teaches me to walk the talk.
  • for my four year old who teaches me that every impatient thing I tell her she will eventually say back to me. Read more

29 Cool Ways to Welcome and Celebrate Summer

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June 21st was the Summer Solstice, the first day of Summer and the longest day of the year. Throughout history, people the world over have observed this event with various celebrations in the month of June.

For ancient people, there was a good cause for celebration, as well as relief: the snow had disappeared, warm temperatures had returned, and flowers were blooming. It was easier to find food. Now you could just kick back and party until it was time to harvest in the fall.

Why do you need to know this? No reason, except it gives you another excuse to stop and celebrate life. Your life. Congratulations for making it through another winter! Here are some suggestions to welcome summer.

  1. Throw a party. Have some friends over, cook for them, have music, make sure everyone dances outside.
  2. Walk in the grass barefoot. Get connected to the earth.
  3. Lie on the ground and stare up at the night sky for a long time. Or talk a walk, hike or dance by the full moon.
  4. Plant a tree, flowers or vegetables. Cucumber, squash, beans, melons. Learn to grow something.
  5. Walk around naked.  You decide where, just don’t get arrested.
  6. Have a picnic. Don’t wait for any special occasion. Just hang out, read a book, take a nap.
  7. Go to an outdoor concert. Hollywood Bowl is cool, so is the Greek Theatre. Or check out the Arboretum’s Festival on the Green. 
  8. Make some sun tea. Chai tea is great, so is mint tea.
  9. Build a bonfire and burn some winter clothes. Or make an effigy of your old screwed up self and set it on fire. Again, check with local ordinances, don’t get arrested!
  10. Make a reading list for summer. One fun book, one biography, one heavy book.
  11. Make a summer movie list. You know those movies you always wanted to see? Just do it.
  12. Go to a nursery and smell all  the flowers. Especially the gardenias, they always remind me of my mom.
  13. Find a body of water to sit by for a day. The beach, a lake, a stream. Dunk yourself under and say “Water, cleanse me of whatever needs to be cleansed.” Combine with number 6.
  14. Start meditating or walking in the mornings. It light and easier to get up.
  15. Take a yoga class. Even you, dude. Especially you.
  16. Take a tai chi class.
  17. Get a bunch of water balloons and go at it with your kids. Or let them run around in the sprinklers.

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    Jude with Sprinkler Hat

  18. Take a vacation, for God’s sake. Drive there.
  19. Start keeping a journal “What I Did in the Summer of 2011.” You never know what’s going to happen…
  20. Go buy a watermelon or a bag of peaches.
  21. Make some ice cream.
  22. Play baseball or softball.
  23. Go buy yourself some toy you always wanted: a big bubble wand, a super soaker squirt gun, a telescope, whatever.
  24. Watch nightfall on your porch or lawn. Have a candle ready to light.
  25. Blow up a bunch of helium balloons and tie a blank note to each one. Carry them around in your trunk, and when something good happens to you, pull out a balloon and write on the note “I’m grateful for ___.” Then release the balloon.
  26. Watch this video, and/or this video.
  27. Get out and see some fireworks on the Fourth of July.
  28. Establish your own country or religion. Mine is “The Friendly but Unpredictable Dictatorship of Tedsmania.” The state religion “Tedleyism”
  29. Celebrate your independence from: what people think of you, barfy emotions such as self pity, fast food, complaining, the past, worrying about the future, and silly statements such as “Sorry, I don’t sing or dance.”

Did I leave anything out? Anything you want to add? Leave a comment!

Happy Summer!

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Your companion on the journey to transformation,

TMan

Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
www.TedMoreno.com
Seashell photo by Skye Moorhead
www.SkyeMoorhead.com
 
FEEL FREE TO — USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE, WEB SITE OR BLOG. Just let me know that you are, and include the following with it:
Ted A. Moreno is a Certified Hypnotherapist and Success Performance Coach. Ted empowers his clients to transform their lives by helping them reach their goals of success, abundance, personal development, health and happiness. To learn more, visit www.TedMoreno.com/blog

 

What Being A Father Has Taught Me About Me

 

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The Rock, Hauber the Fish, and Chick

 

I’ve been a father now for five and half years. I have two daughters that I  refer to as Chick and the Rock. Two days a week I’m a stay home dad. I’ll say this much, life is interesting.

For most of my life I had no interest in being a father. Read more

A New Years Message

The Greatest Gifts

  • May we break down boundaries, tear down walls, and build on the foundation of goodness inside each of us.
  • May we look past differences, gain understanding and embrace acceptance.
  • May we reach out to each other, rather than resist.
  • May we be better stewards of the earth, protecting, nurturing, and replenishing the beauties of nature.
  • May we practice gratitude for all we have, rather than complain about our needs.
  • May we seek cures for the sick, help for the hungry, and love for the lonely.
  • May we share our talents, give of our time, and teach our children.
  •  May we hold hope for the future very tenderly in our hearts and do all we can to build for bright tomorrows.

And may we LOVE with our whole hearts…for that is the only way to love.

Author Unknown

(This was sent to me by the lady who sold me my house, Mary Macias with Keller Williams Realty. Thanks Mary!)

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks using the buttons below.

Wishing you a very happy and prosperous New Year,

TMan

Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
Specializing in Your Success
www.TedMoreno.com                                                                       
 (626) 826-0612

Ted’s Musical Holiday Greeting

Thanks to everyone who reads Ted’s Tips for Transformation! I appreciate your support and comments. Wishing everyone a very warm (and dry) Holiday Season and a Happy New Year! Here’s my version of “The Christmas Song”

Season of Darkness, Season of Light

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Something happened on December 21st at 3:38 pm, PST. The sun was at it’s lowest point on the horizon, the point in the year where the the night is longest and the day is the shortest in the Northern Hemisphere. This is known as the Read more

Do Space Aliens Feel Alienated?

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I was standing in my back yard one night looking up at the Orion Constellation. It was cold and quiet. Suddenly, without any warning, I was blasted with an intensly blinding light, causing me to shut my eyes and fall to the ground!

The light quickly diminished, and when I was able to open my eyes, I found myself not in my backyard anymore, but in a circular  steel room filled with a strange light. With a gasp, my bones went cold as I realized that I had been abducted by aliens

An invisible door slid open and a tiny alien, not more than a foot high,  shuffled toward me. He looked just like those aliens you see in the movies with the really big eyes,  except he was wearing a Star Wars T Shirt.

“Not in Kansas anymore, are ya bud?” For such a tiny fellow, his voice was a  cross between James Earl Jones and Matthew McConaughey.  A plush chair  appeared from nowhere and he sat down.  I thought about stepping on him, but he must’ve picked that up because he said “I can vaporize you with a thought, so sit down.” I sat on the plastic folding chair that materialized behind me.

“You’re some kind of therapist, right?” he said with a heavy sigh.

“I-I-I’m a hypnotherapist, I stammered, “but I…”

“Then can ya shut up and listen? It’s not all about you pal.” He sounded tired and defeated. “I feel like I’m not a part of anything these days. I just don’t know my place in the universe.” I don’t feel any connection to anything. I feel…”

“Alienated?” I offered.

“Yeah, alienated, smart ass. You probably have no clue what I’m talking about. Why did I decide to come to planet Knucklehead? I should’ve looked for someone on Cygnus x-1!” He looked so sad, I felt the urge to pick him up and hug him.

“Touch me and I’ll have you probed, punk!,” now sounding like a cross between Darth Vader and Clint Eastwood.

“Okay, calm down,” I replied.  “Look, I do have a clue. In our culture, alienation is a big problem. Especially this time of year.”

“The silly season?”

“There’s people who call it that. Some humans feel alienated and disconnected this time of year because they don’t feel a part of everything that’s going on. They  look around and see others getting together with family, enjoying traditions, or spending lots of money, and it makes them feel left out if they don’t have those things, or they just feel overwhelmed.”

“We don’t have families. We’re raised on pod farms.” he said flatly.

“Bummer,” I said.

“Yeah, real bummer. I travel this vast universe, from  galaxy to distant galaxy, so much space, so little life. Chunks of floating dustballs, gas clouds, stars being born, dying. What does it have to do with me? I’m a speck. All this technology, all this science, still doesn’t keep me from feeling alone, apart, and like there is no meaning to it all.”

“Kind of like that old song ‘Rocket Man.‘”

“Yeah, but this ain’t no rocket, chump. This space ride has a state of the art plasma drive that will get you from 0 to nowhere in the blink of your primitive eye.  And don’t forget it, fossil fool.”

“Just relax there, big guy. Point is that we humans have been dealing with feelings of social alienation, loneliness, and detachment since societies were created, particularly in our modern age. Our philosophers from Karl Marx through Kierkegaard and Heidegger and even Pope John Paul II have dealt with this issue.

“You seem knowledgable, human.”

“Nah, I’m just good with Wikipedia. Consider this:  if you’re looking for meaning, you may never find it. Like you said, it’s a big cold universe out there. Dust balls and nebulae probably don’t mean anything by themselves. But you are a part of the universe that can think, and you can make it mean something, like beauty or order or intelligence. You’re like humans in that…

“Careful! Don’t compare me to a species that just came down from the trees!!

“Sorry. As intelligent beings, humans have in common the need to make meaning. But I don’t think there’s any meaning aside from the meaning we choose to create. Which is good, because then we  can make things mean whatever we want them to, as long as it supports us in being who we want to be. Of course, who you want to be is also determined by you.”

‘Hmm,” he said pensively, rubbing his  little alien chin.

“Once you decide on a meaning that resonates with you, then you can connect with other people, or, uh, beings, that feel the way you do. Then you’re a part of something and not so, you know, um, alienated. I’m sure you have friends?”

“I’m in touch with some of my pod mates.”

“Okay, so why not develop a better relationship with them, then maybe they can become your family. I read something once: ‘The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other’s life. Rarely do members of one family grow up under the same roof.'”

“Interesting. Continue.”

“So you can make your life mean whatever you want, whatever floats your ship. You can create connection with whoever you choose, or contribute to whoever or whatever you choose. There was a time when I felt alienated at the holidays, when I was younger and single, until I created my own meaning for them. I’ve also created my own meaning for my life, why I’m here, and how I should live it. Now that’s my meaning, and I own it.”

“I see now that I have chosen to isolate myself in the empty darkness surrounding the stars and nebulae.”

“So did I at one time. Now I’ve chosen to be part of a family.”

“A female companion and two smaller but very loud females.”

“It’s called a wife and two kids. How’d you know?”

“I have the ability to transport you to my starship from a distant galaxy but I’m not smart enough to Facebook you?”

“Right. Point is,  your family can be anyone who you feel the desire to share a part of yourself with. Look at you and me, we’ve connected, haven’t we?”

“Indeed. You give me things to think about, surprisingly, for a lifeform obsessed with keeping coffee grounds out of the kitchen sink.”

“I’m only human, after all.”

“My condolences. Time to zap you back to your dwelling, then I’m outta here. Your culture’s holiday music is driving me nuts.”

“Wait! How’d you find me? Where’d you get that T-shirt? What’s your name?

“Google – Spielberg gave it to me – the name: unpronounceable to you. Translates to “Great Things Come in Small Packages.”

“You’re pulling my leg.”

“I said it, I meant it, and I’m here to represent it. Hasta la vista, baby.”

In the next blink, I was  in my backyard again, the Orion Constellation staring down at me hard and bright through the crisp night sky.

Beings from the other side of the cosmos feeling disconnected and alone. Guess it’s a small universe after all.

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks.

Dedicated to helping you move to your next level of greatness,

TMan

 Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
www.TedMoreno.com                                                                       
 (626) 826-0612
Photo by Skye Moorhead
www.skyemoorhead.com