How to Be Peaceful

Peace. In the media you will hear that word almost daily. Peace talks. Peace in the Middle East. The peace process. Peace activists. Nobel Peace Prize. Peace of mind. Peace and quiet.

Most people want and strive for peace. Yet, peace seems in  short supply these days. Why is peace so rare in our lives, as well as in the world at large? Sometimes it appears that long lasting peace is almost impossible. Granted, there exists an abundance of beauty and harmony, and even though it may not seem like it, the vast majority of the world is not at war (at least not in political wars.) In spite of that, we must acknowledge that as a race, we have a long and bloody history of violence, murder, war, and genocide. I think we can agree that we can do better.

Wikipeda suggests that the definition for peace is “…a state of harmony characterized by the lack of violent conflict.” However, this definition seems incomplete, as many of us are apparently free from violent conflict yet still don’t have the level of harmony we yearn for.

How can we find peace? How can we be peaceful in the face of a busy, chaotic and seemingly troubled world?

Einstein suggested “You cannot solve a problem from the same consciousness that created it. You must learn to see the world anew.” To move from disharmony to peace, we must adopt a different consciousness. Great. So what the heck does that mean?

It means that we must come to understand that if our outer world is not peaceful, it is a reflection of our inner world. All peace starts with inner peace. And your inner peace need not depend on what is going on around you. Peace begins in your mind.

Peace is our birthright. It is ours to claim whenever we want to.  Peace is not something that you find. It is something you allow, then continue to create and nurture. It is a decision towards a state of being. To say “I will be peaceful when…”, or “I can’t be peaceful until…” indicates that you are giving up your responsibility for creating peace, and giving it to something or someone else. Inner peace comes from you, choosing to have peaceful thoughts, which results in a peaceful life. Where there is anger, fear and negativity, there can be no peace.

The poet Rumi said “Out beyond ideas of right doing and wrong doing, there is a field, I’ll meet you there.” Peace exists in the space beyond our ideas of how it should be, beyond our judgments and ideologies, beyond our life situation (name, occupation, age, sex, etc.)

Peace comes from the acceptance of what is, here, in front of you, in front of me.  Anything else is insanity.  We lose peace when we see the world as happening to us, instead of realizing that the world we inhabit is of our own creation and therefore, an extension of us.

What is, what is? It’s your life. You can call it the good, the bad and the ugly. You can call it “sh*t happens”. You can call it “what will be, will be, que sera sera”. Or you can just call it your life.

Your life with pain, that’s what is. Your life with disappointment. Your life with sadness, regret, resentment, anger, confusion, loneliness. You want it to be different? It wouldn’t be life.

What is, is also your life with incredible bliss. Your life with joy. Your life with love, happiness, fun, companionship, good times, warm memories, clarity and wisdom. Being peaceful means staying centered and unaffected by the inevitable ebb and flow of your life, realizing that that is what is, and blessed be.

To accept what is  doesn’t meant that you have to like it. I don’t like when the weather is over 100 degrees, but it doesn’t affect my inner peace. To accept what is doesn’t mean you condone it. To be peaceful by accepting what is doesn’t even mean that you don’t try to change it. It just means that you choose peace while you are making the effort.

Let’s face it, it can be challenging to find peace in the middle of a divorce, or when you are losing your house, or worse, your loved one. But the challenge comes not from what is happening, but by the mental conflict we create by what we make it mean, or how we think it should be, or what we think should happen. But we can never be at peace with what we feel should, could, might, possibly, ought to, would like to, would prefer to happen. We can only be at peace with what is happening, now.

Granted, this is not the current consciousness of most human beings. But that does not mean it is not possible. Remember what Einstein said, “You must learn to see the world anew.” It’s my opinion that we as a race are at this very moment waking up and learning to see the world anew.  It is truly a gift to be living through such a momentous time in history. We can see clearly now, that if we want to have peace in our world, we must start by having  peace within. And when we do, we will see more and more symptoms of inner peace.

If being peaceful is a state that you aspire to, here are just a few things to think about.

• Choose peace. Claim it as yours. Declare that you aim to be a peaceful person. Write it on a sign and hang it on your wall. When times get tough, as they most surely will, you may need to choose peace every hour, or every minute.
• Think peace. Is there violent conflict residing between your ears? You have a choice as to what you think. You can choose to think: “I can be peaceful, with this traffic, with this person, with this situation, with me.” You can ask “How can I be peaceful, in this situation that confronts me?”
• Act with peace. What actions bring you peace? What actions bring you conflict?  Are you willing to give up who you’ve been for who you can be? Peaceful action doesn’t mean you have to sit still all day or talk like Kwai Chang Caine. It means that you avoid choosing actions that create conflict, in yourself or others. Should you need to confront, do it with the intention of peaceful resolution.
• Surround yourself with peace. As much as you can, create an environment of peace around you through beauty, space, order, calm. Wake up to music, instead of “alarm”. Leave earlier for work, to avoid hurry. Avoid those who would disturb your harmony. Teach peace to your children. Or better yet, let them teach you.

Peace is a practice. When would now be the best time to begin?

Peace be with you, me and us~

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Your companion on the journey to transformation,

TMan

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