Who Do You Have To Be To Get What You Want?

What makes the elephant charge his tusk in the misty mist, or the dusky dusk? What makes the muskrat guard his musk? Courage!

In last weeks post (Opening the Door to Success:GOALS) I discussed how to create goals. You take a desire, you turn it into a goal by writing it down using the SMART formula, and you make a plan. That’s what you do. However, there is a much more important part to getting what you want.

In 2003 when I signed on the dotted line to register for hypnotherapy school, a very familiar and habitual thought came into my mind. It went something like this: “Are you really going to do this? You’ve started a lot of things that you have never finished. Are you really going to use this education?”

I have to admit, that was a very scary voice. At that time in my life, I was desperate to find a meaningful and enjoyable career to which I could apply my passion, enthusiasm, time and energy. Becoming a hypnotherapist seemed like what I had been looking for. But the voice was right; I’d had many jobs, started many things that kind of petered out. The idea of going to school, investing time and money, and wasting it all by not following through, well, frankly, it horrified me.

At one point the voice started up with “If this doesn’t work out, maybe you can try…” Suddenly,  in my mind I said “Stop! This is it. I will make it work out. I will not let this opportunity pass me by without giving it my best shot. I refuse to consider that this won’t work for me.”

What I had done was to make a declaration: I was no longer a person that started things and didn’t finish. To get what I wanted, I needed to become a person who followed through. The first thing I did was to book a hypnotherapy appointment for myself to make sure that I continued to become that person.

Maybe you’ve had an experience like that. Where who you were changed because of a decision you made. Let me suggest that it really is that simple. You must make the decision to be the person you need to be to get what you want. It may be uncomfortable, it may be unfamiliar, you may not know what it looks like, etc. But your personality will have to change. I have heard people say, “I’d like to have that (goal) but I’m not that kind of person that can do that, it’s not in my nature….” Bullpoop! You can change your nature. To go from where you are to where you want to be, you must.

Here are some qualities that I believe are essential for anyone that sets goals and intends to achieve them. These are in part taken from one of the best investments I have ever made in personal development, “Dynamics of Personal Goal Setting” by Paul J. Meyer.

• You must be a person who is goal oriented. You must beleive that it’s important to have goals and to work to achieve them. If you are not willing to become one of these people then stop reading this right now, get yourself some Cheetos or Doritos and go watch television. You must be a person who desires to accomplish something. You must be a person who sets goals regularly. It all starts there.
• You must be a person who is comfortable with being uncomfortable. What you are doing now is comfortable. If you are not getting what you want, you must do something different. Doing something different will feel uncomfortable. Be OK with that. Realize that there is no change without discomfort. Expect it, and step right into it.
• You must become a person that learns to overcome inertia and takes action now. Inertia is the tendency for bodies to remain at rest. This can be applied to minds as well. It’s  hard to get off the sofa to go out and jog. But once you are jogging, it’s a lot easier to continue to put on foot in front of the other. That’s because once you start, you have momentum that carries you forward. Inertia affects us all. To get what you want, you must learn to overcome it and take action. Period.
• You must be courageous. It can be scary to set a goal. It’s risky. You must have the courage to take risks. What if you fail? What if you don’t do it right? What if there are obstacles? Rest assured, there will be obstacles, you can count on it. Be courageous and start anyway and deal with the obstacles when they come.  You might be afraid to face your own weaknesses. You’re not good with people, money, sales, travelling, speaking in public, etc, etc, etc. You can learn.  Having courage doesn’t mean you are not afraid, it means that you move forward in spite of the fear. And everyone has fear. Even you. Yes, you.
• You must be supremely confident. I almost typed “You must have confidence.” But confidence is not something you have, it’s something you are. You say you are not confident? You can become confident. You can learn. Taking the steps I outlined in the last post to create your goals will give you confidence. Confidence simply means you have developed the belief that you can and will accomplish your goals.
• You must be determined. By determined I mean you refuse to be stopped, side tracked, or distracted. Have you heard the story of how Sylvester Stallone sold his script for the movie “Rocky”? It truly is one of the most inspiring stories I have ever heard and a testament to dogged determination. Click on this link to hear Tony Robbins tell the tale.
• You must be a person who can generate energy and motivation. Somedays, you will not feel motivated. Sometimes you will not have the energy. If there is something you need to do, the absolute worst thing you can do is say is “I don’t really feel motivated” or “I don’t have the energy”. Say “Even though I don’t have the motivation or energy, I’m going to do it anyway.” Let’s face it folks, lack of motivation is one thing and one thing only: a bad habit. Lack of energy can be the same thing although there may be dietary or other physical issues that may need to be addressed. If you really want to achieve your goals, you will address them.

The good news is, you don’t have to do it all on your own. Take a self-development course or seminar. Call a therapist or hypnotherapist (preferably me). Read a book. The human mind is one of the most powerful forces on earth. What are you doing with it?

Here’s to looking at you (become who you need to be)!

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