One Way to Handle Unwanted Emotions

I have two small children, little girls, ages 2 and 3 1/2. (For the purposes of this blog, they shall be referred to as Fingers and Matrix Chick.) Anyway, as many a parent can relate to, sometimes the whining, fits, insubordination, chant-like requests for “binky” and power struggles between the two can raise the blood pressure of any Zen Master ( which I am certainly not).

Sometimes, in fact, after a full day with them, vainly trying to accomplish something or at the very least, peace and quiet, I find myself in a state which, shall we say, is almost the opposite of loving, gentle and patient. Not wanting to be the subject of some future “Daddy Dearest” tome, I use one technique to cope that always releases me my from my anger and frustation, and that is EFT.

EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique, is something that I teach to almost all of my clients at some point or another. EFT is one of many therapies under the umbrella of Energy Psychology. It’s easy to learn, simple to perform, and in my experience, very effective. There is some controversy surrounding the efficacy of EFT as there has not been much research conducted that has been accepted by the established medical/psychological community. However, there is enough anecdotal evidence (along with  my own experience using it on myself and my clients) to suggest that it’s worth the time to learn it and see if it works for you.

The philosophy behind EFT states that  negative emotions are a result of a disruption in the the body’s energy system. EFT involves tapping on various parts of the body that correspond to acupuncture points. The tapping is said to balance and neutralize these disruptions.  The first time I saw EFT demonstrated I had no interest whatsoever. It seemed too simple and frankly, looked a little silly when you did it. However, EFT started popping up everywhere in my experience, from seminars teaching it to Dr. Mercola’s site, to books by Kevin Trudeau, the “……they don’t want you to know about”  infomercial guy.

I figured Somebody was trying to tell me something so I learned EFT and taught it to one client, who came back the next week and said “Wow, that really works.” I started showing clients how to do EFT in session and started sending them home with a guide I downloaded from the EFT website. Now I teach this to all my clients at about the 2nd or 3rd session usually.  Not all clients are inclined to use this tool, but the ones that do tell me they get results.

Some would suggest that EFT is a panacea for whatever ails you. ( I use EFT with my clients mainly for intense emotions such as anxiety, anger, depression, fear and sometimes with pain. If you are interested in learning EFT, you can go to and read more about it as well as download a free, detailed how-to-do-it manual.

Just a disclaimer here, I’m not suggesting you use EFT if a doctor would be more appropriate. EFT can be an helpful adjunct to medical and/or psychological intervention.

I hope this tool is a handy addition to your coping skills toolbox.

Stay cool and be calm,


1 reply
  1. Natalie J. Moreno
    Natalie J. Moreno says:

    Love it. Very true about the names. The girls will forever be referred to as Fingers and Matrix Chick. I definitely need to practice EFT more often.


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