Standing in Awe of the Power of Belief  – Episode 412



 

What do you believe? Why do you believe it? Do you believe that what you believe is true? How do you know? How do your beliefs impact your life positively and negatively? Are you willing to change beliefs that don’t work for you? Ted takes a deep dive into these questions in a way that may give you a different perspective about what you believe.

 

 

 

 


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P.S.

If you have core beliefs that are not working for you and you want to change them, request a complimentary consultation with Ted to explore if hypnotherapy can transform your challenges into possibility! Click here to request a consultation: https://tedmoreno.com/ready-to-get-started/

It’s 2023. So What? – Episode 411

 

Ok, so New Year’s resolutions just don’t seem to work. So how should we treat the New Year? As just another day? Should we set goals, intentions or just let life happen the way it does? What if we really want to bring something new into our lives? Good questions that Ted takes on in the first Ted in Your Head podcast of 2023.

 

 

 

 

 

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P.S.
If you are having trouble achieving your goals or finding the motivation to make it happen, request a complimentary consultation with Ted to explore if hypnotherapy can transform your challenges into possibility! Click here to request a consultation: https://tedmoreno.com/ready-to-get-started/

 

Embrace Your Place: Powerfully Claiming Your Existence – Episode 408

Let me start with a story goes back to when I was 7 years old. I was in church with my dad, which was strange because I’m the oldest of 8 kids and usually if I was in church it was with my 7 other siblings and mom and dad. Maybe he wanted company that day, I don’t know.

Everything was fine until my nose started to run. Now, I had allergies as a kid, nothing serious, so I always carried a clump of Kleenex with me. I reached into my pocket, pulled out my Kleenex clump, and wiped my nose but it still kept running.

Soon the clump of Kleenex was a snotty mess so I secretly threw it on the floor of the church and immediately felt like a sinner for desecrating the Lord’s house with my snotty tissue. And my nose kept running.

If I had a long sleeve shirt I would’ve wiped it on my sleeve but I had a short sleeve shirt. I tried wiping my nose on my bare skin on the back of my hand but that was really gross and I started to feel really miserable because my nose kept running.

What I started doing was squeezing all the snot from my nose into my hand and wiping it underneath my pant leg. Soon my pant leg was wet and snotty and I almost started crying when my dad noticed my discomfort and asked me “What’s going on?”

I told him with tears in my eyes “Sorry Dad, I’m so sorry my nose keeps running and I don’t know what to do!”

He reached into his back pocket and gave me his handkerchief which solved the problem. After church, he asked “Why didn’t you tell me?”

I think I might’ve said that I didn’t want to bother him. But looking back, the truth is that I didn’t feel I was allowed to ask for what I needed. The church was more important, not talking was more important, not bothering my dad was more important than my discomfort. He had 8 kids and he seemed like he was bothered a lot.

That’s how I felt as a kid.

Maybe your childhood was different, but I know I’m not the only one that felt this way as a kid. Now I had and still have decent hardworking parents and I’m grateful. But the messages I got as a kid from the world around me went something like this:

· Who do you think you are? You’re not special.

· Don’t call attention to yourself, don’t toot your own horn

· Stay in your lane.

· Follow the rules

· Don’t be a bother

· Don’t take more than your share

· You only get what you deserve.

· Don’t rock the boat.

I think if you look for the hidden meaning behind these messages, I think it comes down to two very disempowering ideas: what you think and say doesn’t matter and what you want and need doesn’t matter. And this is a very unconscious. Nobody actually tells you that but that’s the message. We don’t think these things consciously either. But it’s kind of like a computer virus, a mind virus, operating in the background. Programming is a good name for it.

So as we grow up, and try to make our way in the world. We encounter challenges, we make mistakes, we fail to do what we set out to do and then we might even start to reinforce these negative messages with our own negative self-talk. And even as adults we have people reinforcing these things. Family members, bosses, religion: you are a sinner. And that starts to feed these mind viruses and they grow. It’s possible to find ourselves with the feeling that we need to apologize for who we are because we feel bad about ourselves. It’s possible for some people to get to the point where they feel they need to apologize just for being alive. And that’s a sad state of affairs. Some people overcompensate by being bullies or being demanding or obnoxious and that’s sad too.

These are the messages many of us receive and I know that for a fact after almost 20 years as a hypnotherapist working with thousands of clients. There’s only one word to describe these kinds of negative messages we get from the world. It’s all bullshit.

Speaking of a sad state of affairs, For most of my life, I believed I was fuckup.

Sorry, but that’s the word I used to myself. I believed I would screw it up. Whatever it was, job, relationship, life, whatever. I didn’t want to get married, have kids, buy a house or start a business. Why, so I could screw it up? So I would sabotage myself. With stuff like perfectionism. “If I can’t do it perfectly, I won’t do it at all.” That’s a very sneaky form of self-sabotage, which is something I struggled with a lot when I was young.

And so consequently, I was always asking myself one terrible question. What’s wrong with me?

As a hypnotherapist, I see things. I hear things. Some of my clients tell me that they get on social media. And they say oh look they’ve got a beautiful house, beautiful car. Look what they’re doing, wonderful vacations, nice restaurants. So it’s easy for them to think, “How come I’m not doing that? How come I don’t have that? What the hell is wrong with me?”

Now, we’re not talking about you of course. But you might know someone that can relate.

The only thing wrong with most people is that someone told them some bullshit and they believed it.

Mark Twain said: “The trouble with most of us is that we know too much that aint so.”

We believe what we’re told. That’s what we do as little kids. From the time we’re born until 8 or 9 years old we take in everything as absolute truth. So when people come to my

hypnotherapy office because they don’t feel good about themselves, or they feel less than, I tell them “Hey, It’s the programming. Just the programming. The mind viruses you caught from someone else. It’s not your fault. It’s not who you are, it’s just how you are thinking and what you believe, and the good news is that you can change your thinking and what you believe.”

And that’s what I want to talk about today. How to claim our rightful place in this world by changing what we believe. And guess what. You don’t need to do anything or accomplish anything or be anybody to believe that you are ok. It’s a decision you make. Because your value, your worth, doesn’t have to depend on anything out there, it comes from within.

The first step is to realize just how much BS there is out there. There is a lot. All the socialization that tells you that you’re nothing unless you have this or are doing this or making this. It’s hard to find the truth.

Let’s look for what’s true shall we? Here’s the interesting thing about truth. It’s self-evident, we should be able to see it for ourselves. We shouldn’t have to take anybody else’s word about what is true.

I can’t speak for you, but what is evidently true for me, is that I exist. I am. What that means is that I’m having an experience. Right now. That’s the only thing I can say for sure. I have an awareness that I am having an experience that I call life. This awareness is a fundamental quality of our being by the way. My awareness right now, in this moment, is that life is pretty darn good.

Look around you. Are you reading this on a computer in a comfortable house? I’m writing this on a computer in a nice house in a nice neighborhood. What are the chances of that? I don’t know but what I can tell is that right now, that’s pretty cool. I feel lucky to be here.

What did I do to deserve this? The answer is it doesn’t matter because deserves has got nothing to do with it. The idea that you only get what you deserve is just more bullshit. Plenty of people have what they don’t deserve and plenty of others never get what they do deserve. Would you agree? So let’s remove from deserves from the equation.

Because here’s the thing. Somehow, someway, I came into existence. I didn’t ask to be born but here I am. I’ve been given life and I consider that a gift.

If you can say to yourself, I exist or I am, then you’ve been given that gift too. And far as I know none of us did anything to deserve it. But here we are.

And look what you get as part of the deal. Eyes to see. A mouth to taste. A nose to smell. Ears to hear. A heart to feel. A brain to think.

And so, just by virtue of being born, you get the sun. The moon, the stars, the sea. You get mountains, trees, rivers, lakes. Flowers, clouds, rain, snow. All the beauty of the world is yours should you choose to enjoy it. You were gifted with 4000 years of music, 3000 years of poetry, literature. 50, 000 years of art. It’s yours. You inherited it.

You get to love, be loved and have your heart broken. You get to succeed and fail. You get to have challenges. If you didn’t have challenges you would invent some I can assure you of that. You get to be young and grow old if you’re lucky. You get to dream and realize your dreams. Or not.

All this just for being born. Hell of a deal. The universe or God or whatever must love you because it has seen fit to have you here now.

Sometime in the 90s I was sitting on a mountain looking out over a beautiful valley in the Catalina Mountains of Tucson Arizona. They call these mountains sky islands because you can drive from the desert and in 30 minutes be in lush pine forests.

A voice spoke to me. It might’ve been the voice of God or nature or those mushrooms I ate. But the voice said something really profound: You’re ok Ted. There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re just figuring it out like everybody else. You’re only human, and that’s ok. It’s good that you’re here. Don’t worry, we’ve got your back.

I never heard that before in that way. In way that was so validating. It took a while for me to completely get that, but I did and that shift of perspective changed my life and has brought me here today to share that message with you.

Ever seen Gone with the Wind? There’s a great scene. Scarlett O Hara is the protagonist. She grew up on her family’s plantation vain, self-centered, spoiled by wealthy parents. The civil war comes and sweeps away her wealthy lifestyle. She finds herself destitute and starving. She goes out to the fields to find something to eat but the only thing she can pull out of the ground is a withered carrot. She tried to eat it but gags. She falls to the ground miserable and crying. But then she stands up. She raises her fist to the sky and in a moment of desperation but also of empowerment, she says “As God is my witness I will never be hungry again.”

Have you ever made a declaration like that? Have you ever been down on you knees or with your back against the wall and you said “ I don’t care what it takes or what I have to do, I’m going to make this happen.”

Because that’s what we need to do.

If anything I said resonated with you today, then what you want to do is make a powerful declaration by calling on the powers that be and saying out loud or in the silence of your mind, “As the Universe or God is my witness I belong here. It’s good that I’m here. Even if I’ve screwed up. Even if I’m made mistakes. Even if I don’t have that thing that other people have even if I’m not doing that amazing thing they’re doing. Even if I’ve done things I’m not proud of even if I fuck it up, I’m doing my best, it’s ok that I’m here and it’s good that I’m here.”

I would suggest to you that this is the most powerful perspective that you will ever adopt. This is the most powerful thing to believe.

Reject any message you ever got from others or yourself that said that you are not good enough or less than or there’s something wrong with you. You are whole and complete right here, right now. You are unique and special and inherently awesome. This is your home. This is your life. Life is up and then it’s down, that’s life. It’s hard sometimes but that doesn’t mean that you suck.

Refuse to apologize for being alive, for being here now. Make a commitment to being unapologetically you. Embrace that fact that you are here now and that that is a good thing if for no other reason than because you say so. Believe you are here for a reason. Is that true? It doesn’t matter, it’s a good belief to have. It’s a good place to stand. Here’s a quote by Anonymous: The two most important days of your life is the day you were born and the day you find out why.

Stake your claim to all the joy and happiness and wonder and awe you can get your hands on. Be willing to receive what you didn’t earn or don’t deserve but also be willing to do something to attract what you want into your life. You have a right to ask for what you want and what you need and what you want and need is important. Life itself is a gift given to you for reasons we don’t understand, and we don’t have to.

Here’s another quote for you “We have a responsibility to love ourselves. If we don’t, we are contributing to the world’s problems.”

Marianne Williamson said that in her book A Return to Love. Here’s another quote from that book you might’ve heard:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Do whatever you can to liberate yourself from fear, from the bad things that happened in the past and from the BS. Do what you can to love and care for yourself. And above all, be grateful.

Listen to this podcast episode at the link below.
TedinYourHead.com

7 Steps to Fulfill Your Desires in 2018

fulfill your desires

Here we are finishing the first month of the New Year. How’s it going for you? Are you on track to fulfill your desires?

If you are like most people, things are the same as the were this time last year, in other words, “same stuff, different day.” You probably realize that making resolutions isn’t a good way to fulfill your desires. I read somewhere that only 8% of those that make resolutions actually keep them.

To fulfill your desires, there are definite steps you need to take to manifest what you want in your life.

Setting Goals and Intentions: The Key to Fulfill Your Desires

  1. First of all, you need to subscribe to the belief that you CAN get what you want, that you are deserving, worthy, and able to fufill your desires and dreams. You must believe that the Universe, or God, or Infinite Intelligence  has your back. Nothing will happen if you believe that you can’t do it, or that you should be punished, or that it’s not worth the hassle, or that God doesn’t want you to fulfill your desires and dreams. If you need help with this part, you should click here.
  2. Next, to fulfill your desires, you must KNOW what you desire. You need clarity about what you are serious about manifesting.  This takes time and reflection. Do you want to lose weight? Buy a house? A new car? Get a new job? Take a yoga class? Create a new website for your business? Have a better relationship? Take some time to journal/write or having a discussion with someone you trust.
  3. To fulfill your desires, you must write down your goals and desires. This step is where most people get stoppedEvery accomplishment, great or small, started off as an idea in someone’s mind. The trick is to turn that intangible idea into something that happens in physical reality, something you can feel, hear, touch and share with others. Writing your goals and dreams down is an essential step to fulfill your desires because it starts the process of bringing your desires into the physical realm. If you do it on a computer, print it out. You can have goals for business, family, household, health or spirituality. Have a number of different goal sheets for different areas of life. Keep them in a notebook or folder where you can easily find/review them.
  4. Next, set target dates or timelines that indicate when you plan to have your goals and desires accomplished. As opposed to “someday I’ll have this/do this…”, instead, write down exactly when you plan to achieve the goal or fulfill your desires. If it is ongoing, then create a timeline or series of benchmarks. What needs to get done and by when? Put pressure on yourself with deadlines and target dates.
  5. Create action steps. Break down your desires/goals into specific things that you will do to achieve them. For instance, “Call John to discuss proposal” or “Research yoga classes in my area” or “Purchase materials needed.” Nothing will happen without taking action!
  6. Reinforce the goal/desire on a consistent basis. There are a many ways to do this. Review goals weekly or monthly. It’s easy to set a goal and then forget about it, easy for our dreams and desires to get covered up by the busyness of life. Life is a moving parade, so to fulfill your desires, you must stay focused on what you want. it’s  Set a time and a day every week or every month when you will do this and review your progress, keeping your desires top of mind. In addition, use positive statements about your ability to fulfill your desires, goals and dreams. These are called affirmations. Say them/read them right before bed with your mind is very suggestible.
  7. Finally, celebrate when you accomplish something! Set rewards for achieving your desires, such as a trip or vacation, or buying something you want, or just a day off. Reinforce the good feeling of accomplishment that comes when you fulfill your desires.

Get Your Subconscious Mind On Board

Remember, your subconscious mind, (88% of your total mind, according to one theory)  wants everything to stay the same. To the subconscious, the unknown represents pain. If you don’t have it yet, then what you desire is an unknown to your subconscious mind. Since the subconscious avoids unknowns, your subconscious mind will often sabotage your efforts and try to keep you where you are now, because that is what is known, and the subconscious like what is know and familiar, even if you conscious mind wants something different.

The key is to use the steps above to get your subconscious mind familiar and comfortable with what you want: the desired result, the fulfillment of your desire, the compelling outcome. This will take organization, planning and time investment. If you are not used to doing this, then start small with an easily achieved goal. It’s worth it! You can do it! If you need help, contact me by clicking here.

The only language the Universe understands is Faith + Intention + Action. It’s said that God helps those that help themselves. Claim your desire, declare it to to world, then start putting one foot in front of the other to fulfill your desires in 2018.

Have a great year!

Ted

Happiness and The Hypnosis of the Culture Part II

Happiness

Here’s a parable that I think speaks to the topic of happiness and the hypnosis of the culture.

One day a monk stopped by the house of a wealthy man and found the owner busily filling a large steel chest  with gold and silver coins. Puzzled, the monk asked him what he was doing.

The man replied, “Sir, you have no cares. The faithful feed you, and if they do not, it doesn’t matter because you don’t care what happens to your body. But it is different with us householders. We must hoard some of our wealth so that we will not go hungry in time of need.”

The monk’s reply was to invite the rich man to visit him the next day in the hills outside of the city. When he arrived he found that the holy man had dug a pit in front of his hut and was busily filling it with small round stones. He had been working since dawn and had already amassed quite a pile.

“What are you doing, sir?” the man asked. “The mountain behind your hut is covered with these smooth, round stones. Why are you collecting them?”

“For time of need,” the monk replied. “It might happen that all these mountains are washed away, and so I am collecting these stones and hiding them in case I need them.”

“That’s crazy,” the wealthy man replied. “It is not possible for this mountain to be washed away.”

“And it is not possible that Life will fail to lay your food before you,” the monk replied, jumping out of the pit. “It is foolish to waste your precious time hoarding gold and silver. Your task in life is to know yourself at every level. Hoard your energy for accomplishing this noble purpose instead of frittering it away  on petty cares and anxieties.”

I’ve had this little parable for years on a page of magazine print. I can’t even remember where I got it from. I’m surprised that I kept it because it didn’t make a lot of sense to me at the time. Was the message that you shouldn’t be concerned about the future? That saving for a time of need was not important? How can you have happiness without abundance?

I found this filed away recently and I read it again, but now, I get it.  Let me tell you what happened in 2009 that allowed me to understand this story.

In 2009 my wife and I had just purchased our house in the middle of the great recession. House prices were down and so was my business. Many people were losing their homes at the time.

Shortly after moving into my house, I became very afraid. Most of my life I’ve had no desire to buy a house because of the commitment. Now I had a big commitment in the form of a monthly mortgage. I started to worry that if business didn’t pick up I might lose my house just as quickly as I bought it.

The fear began to grow. My business phone was deathly silent. I started to have pictures in my mind of packing up our stuff and moving out.

One night, as I lay in bed unable to sleep, I looked back over my life. I realized that most of my life, I had been without any substantial amount of money or material goods. This made me feel even worse.

But then, something else occurred to me. I have never been homeless. I had never lacked for food. When I needed a car, I was able to get one. I was always able to buy clothes if I needed them. Yet, in spite of all this, I had always been worried about money.

That night, for the first time in my life, I knew I could always count on myself to get by, but more importantly, that Life would provide for me. If we lost the house, we would always have a place to stay. I realized that worrying about it was paralyzing me and keeping me from doing the things I needed to do to attract business. And this worry was stealing my happiness.

My key to happiness was to transform doubt and fear into faith and gratitude.

To break free from the hypnosis of the culture and fully understand that who I was is not defined by my house, my car, or my bank account, but instead, by who I declare myself to be and how well  I am able to live up to that declaration.

I felt gratitude that for the fact that at least that night, I was sleeping in a house that I owned. That my two children were healthy and strong. That my wife was healthy and had a good job which she enjoyed. I felt happiness growing within me as I fell asleep.

I like nice stuff as much as the next guy.  I don’t want to just get by, I want to thrive and I am. But I’ll tell you this, I’ m ever vigilant of the hypnosis of “more and bigger” and it’s ability to infect me. My goal is to explore what it means to be human and  to be present to and grateful for the opportunity to live in this place at this time.

I’m not sure that I could write this if I was homeless, or suffering a tragic loss.  I am not arrogant enough to assume that whatever blessings or good fortune I’ve had is soley the result of anything I’ve done.

In addition,  I don’t know why I got so lucky as to own a home, have a healthy family and a job that I love. I’d like a mansion and Ferrari but I sure as hell don’t need one.

But if I am able to manifest that, it’s not going to happen by looking with envy at what the other guy has and feeling like a failure or less than. It’s going to be by declaring myself incredibly wealthy and blessed right now. These thoughts bring me happiness.

Shortly after that night, the phone start to ring again and my business picked up. I got some  help from coaches and mentors, some who were very generous with their time. The economy seemed to be getting better. Or maybe the only thing that was getting better was me.

Ted 

To listen to a podcast of this blog, go to www.tedmoreno.com/podcast

Photo by Skye Moorhead

www.skyemoorhead.com

Are You a Single Professional Woman with Money Anxiety?

money anxiety

According to a recent survey by a multinational financial services company, 49% of woman that responded, including high income earners, have money anxiety. They fear becoming broke and homeless.

A professional woman that becomes suddenly single due to death, divorce, or separation can find herself overwhelmed with fear and money anxiety. It can be difficult to focus on financial security because of the demands of work and family.

Being overwhelmed by money anxiety can can lead to three major mistakes with serious consequences:

  • Inability  to address money concerns because of fear and avoidence.
  • Loss of confidence in the ability to create abundance
  • Failing to plan for the future.

Release Money Anxiety!

On February 21st, I’ll be presenting a workshop designed for the single professional  woman on her own on how to release money anxiety and create a “money mindset.”

This event, called “Attracting Abundance: Creating a Money Mindset for Single Professional Women” will be held  at the Fuller Seminary Guest and Conference Center located in Pasadena from 9 am to 12:30 pm. The cost will be $77 dollars to attend. Click here to register.

Participants will discover how to create a “money mindset”; a confident feeling of belief and power that allows you to attract opportunity, wealth and prosperity. With the help of powerful exercises and techniques, you can develop the thinking and actions you need to take control of your financial future and release fear and money anxiety.

In this workshop you will also discover:

  • What money really is and what attracts it and repulses it.
  • How to identify thought patterns, beliefs and habits that are keeping you in stuck in scarcity and how release them.
  • How to release money anxiety.
  • How to quickly develop the habits and beliefs that create prosperity consciousness.
  • How to avoid the most common mistakes people make with money
  • How to become “magnetic” to money and what to do with it.

Click here for more information and to register!

This event is designed for the single professional  woman on her own who desires to release fear and anxiety about money anxiety as well as worry, fear, and negativity about money.

If you are a single professional women dealing with money anxiety, you it to yourself to check out this event. It’s only $77! Click here for more information. Click here to learn more.

Hope to see you there,

Ted

Questions? Contact me by clicking here.

The Mental Bank Program: Rewrite Your Mental Script

mindcogs

 

So, has much changed since the New Year has started? If not, don’t be too bummed out. If you’ve been reading my blogs for any period of time, you know it’s all about your programming. If you want things to change, you need to change the programming.

So what if I told you that there is a system that takes five minutes a night that would program your mind for more money, more success and more happiness? Would you take five minutes a night and do it?

You might be saying “Sure, I’ll take five minutes a night to make more money, have more success and happiness!”

Well, the reality is, you’re wrong,  you won’t.  And even though you say you want to be more successful, prosperous, happy, that fact is… you don’t. Change can be the hardest thing in the world. Why?

Because of the most  powerful force in human behavior which is….. homeostasis. The innate drive to stay the same.

We see homeostasis in our physical body; if we get to hot, we sweat to cool down. If we get too cold, we shiver to bring our temperature back to where we are comfortable.

Same thing happens in our mind. For most of us, if we are short of money, out of a job, car soon to be repossessed, we become very motivated. However, when things are going well, we have a tendency to relax. Now, consider this: if things are going too well, we may even sabotage our success. Why would  we do such a thing?

Because our subconscious mind knows only two things: knowns and unknowns. What is known is familiar and comfortable, for example, the amount you have in your bank account. What is unknown is fearful to the subconscious, for example, a lottery winner of mega millions who very quickly finds himself back to where he started, wondering “Where did it all go?”

The subconscious mind makes up 88% of your mind. This is automatic behavior. This is your so called “life script.” And every day you wake up you see it: the car you drive, the house you live in, your bank account etc. This is the information that you receive every day that reinforces your comfort level, that is, your “knowns.

What do we do about our innate drive to stay the same?

The Mental Bank Program

We must work to change incrementally a little every day by sending the subconscious mind different information to get a different result. Putting new information into our subconscious mind can create new “knowns” that are in line with our goals. However, we must introduce this new information in a way that the subconscious mind can understand and take in deeply so that your “ceiling” of success begins to change. The most powerful and simplest way to do this that I have found is through the Mental Bank Program.

The Mental Bank program was invented by Dr. John Kappas, the founder of the Hypnosis Motivation Institute (HMI), the nations first accredited college of hypnotherapy and where I received my training as a hypnotherapist.

You can go to www.MyMentalBank.com and watch George Kappas, director of HMI and son of Dr. John Kappas, present the Mental Bank Program via streaming video. If you are interested in moving yourself forward and beyond your current level of success, performance, wealth or happiness, then I highly recommend this two hour video.

Only a small percentage of people reading this will bother checking out the Mental Bank video, which is why there are so few that are really enjoying the level of success that they would like. I challenge you to take the time to check it out. It’s interesting and informative and George Kappas does a great job making it fun to watch. Let me know what you think about the Mental Bank, OK?

Have a great week,

Ted

It’s Better to Be Grateful than Dead

Grateful

Why do we have only one day a year dedicated to giving thanks? If it was up to me, we would have Thanksgiving day once a week, (minus the huge feast). Think about it: if you lived 80 years, having Thanksgiving day once a year would give you 80 days when you were reminded to be grateful. If you had it every week, you’d have 4,160 days reminding you to make to be grateful. Think that would make a difference in your life? I do.

What’s so great about being grateful? Well, try going a whole week without saying thank you or being appreciative for anything. Complain loud and incessantly that whole week. Walk around with a feeling of entitlement, that the world owes you, and see how you feel. Compare and despair while bemoan what you don’t have. (What? You’re doing already that? You better call me immediately at 626-826-0612 or click here and I’ll give you 25 bucks off your next session.)

Gratitude is not just an attitude, it’s an energy that you generate. If you’re looking for it, you might feel it driving down the freeway in the shadow of beautiful mountains painted in red by the setting sun, or standing outside at night freezing your buns off awash in the glory of a full moon. It make take some practice generating that grateful attitude until you’re feeling  moments of bliss on a regular basis, but believe me, it’s worth it.

Being grateful is not just something you say or think, it’s a feeling that sustains you through the tough times, or gives you the icing when you’ve got your cake and you’re eating it too.

Everything looks better, feels better, works better when you’re grateful. Feeling grateful feels good. Feeling good is good for you, physically, emotionally and spiritually. We know that prolonged negative feelings can adversely impact health. And really, feeling thankful as a way of life is not that hard to do.

Taking it grateful instead of for granted.

I recently had a health scare with one of my children. More like a health terror, because that’s what it felt like. It put me in a place where all I wanted to do was hold both of them tightly and never let go. All of a sudden, their noisiness was not so noisy, their messiness not so messy. What a small price to pay to be able to kiss them while they sleep. I don’t every want to take them for granted; I hope I can always feel blessed that they are in my life.

Sometimes you really get that Life is fragile and unpredictable. One second too soon or a minute too late and there’s a funeral, or some other tragedy, loss or catastrophe. Anything can be taken from you at any time. I appreciate my grandmothers and grandfathers so much more now that they are gone than I ever did when they were alive. Didn’t really appreciate my siblings and parents until I was far, far away from them.

Maybe you need to go through some tough times to really appreciate the  blessings that have been bestowed upon you. My advice is: don’t wait for that to happen.

Every time I see a person sitting at a bus stop in the freezing cold or blazing heat, I’m thankful I have a car. With air conditioning and a heater. I know what it’s like to be cold, hungry, lonely and broke, so now that I’m warm, well fed and surrounded by my family, I’m feeling most of the time like life is grand.

There may be some dead that are grateful aside from Jerry Garcia and the band, but maybe the highest form of gratitude you can have is feeling lucky to be alive.

To be alive means you can be grateful. You get to have that chance. For your sake, take it. You’ve been given the fertile ground to plant and harvest the seeds of gratitude before that ground becomes your bed. Be thankful. For   every    single   little   thing.

(If you’re having trouble feeling the love as the holiday season approaches and you need some help, contact me by clicking here for a free 30 minute phone session.)

Ted A. Moreno
 
Photo by Skye Moorhead
www.skyemoorhead.com
 

Do You Have Scarcity Consciousness?

scarcity consciousness

I’m researching  how to counteract “scarcity consciousness” and create a mindset for wealth and abundance. 

I’m interested in your relationship with money and how you feel and think about it. So I’ve put together a short 10 question survey. I wonder if you would take a few minutes to take the survey if you haven’t already. I will share the results with all. 

Here is the link: https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/J325X9Z. Thank you!

In Deepak Chopra’s book “The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success”, he tells a story about the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, the guy that founded Transcendental Meditation as well as the guy the Beatles hung out with in India.

The Maharishi wanted to organize a massive pilgrimage and attract hundreds of thousands of people to the event.  However, the Maharishi was poor and didn’t have a lot of money. Nevertheless, he continued to plan for the event. One of his organizers, seeing the clear lack of financial resources, approached him. “Sir”, he said, “This is a noble effort, yet it is significant in size and cost. Where will the money come from?” The Maharishi replied “From wherever it is now.”

I don’t know too many people that have this kind of “abundance consciousness”. What seems much more common is “scarcity consciousness”: the feeling that there is not enough. What’s interesting is that this scarcity consciousness seems to have little to do with how much what we actually have.

Examining Scarcity Consciousness

Examining my own life, I’m able to identify some reasons for my own scarcity consciousness in the past. I wonder if any of you can relate.

There were 8 kids in my family, and until I was in the 6th grade my mom stayed at home while my dad worked at his own business. Dad spent a lot of time at work in order to support eight kids.

As a child, I could see that he was stressed out. It seemed to me that to own a business and try to make money was not a good thing, as it meant you would be stressed out and not be able to spend time with your kids.

I went to a Catholic grammar school and high school. In 12 years of my schooling, there was never any discussion of success, money, how to make it, what to do with it, or why we should even care. In fact, the message I received was quite the opposite:  money is the root of all evil, if you want money you are greedy, and it’s easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven.

I entered college with no real goals and certainly no desire to make a lot of money. After slumming my way through college and eventually dropping out, I had a succession of in-home sales jobs which left me struggling financially and  in debt.

I got a “real” job in a mall at a Things Remembered store, but got fired because I kept forgetting to turn on the revolving tower of key blanks. When I got into my car to drive home, my car wouldn’t start.

That night I found an ad in the employment section of the newspaper promising “High pay in a rock and roll atmosphere!”

To make a long story short, I took the job, (another in- home sales gig)  started making a lot of money, gave my beater car away and bought a used Pontiac  Fiero. After a few more months, I lent the Fiero to a friend, and started driving a Porsche. Then I found out that the owners of the company were con men. I quit the job, turned in the Porsche, got back the Fiero (payments were not kept up) and was struggling again. My girlfriend dumped me, I got evicted from my apartment, and my Fiero got repossessed.

At that point, (1987, 27 years old) I remember making five decisions which would reinforce whatever scarcity consciousness I had and impact my life for more than a decade:

  • To aspire to make a lot of money means you have to cheat people.
  • It’s better to be poor (maybe I’ll become a monk…)
  • I never want to own a business.
  • I never want to get married or have kids.
  • I never want to own a house.

In the years that followed, I struggled constantly with a lack of money, but I also did a lot of work on my own personal self development. Somehow, in spite of those experiences and decisions, from  2003 to 2009  I managed to start a business, get married, have kids and buy a house.  I figured I was done with scarcity consciousness.

But the effects of subconscious programming run deep, and exist at a level most of us are not aware of. I’ve become aware that I still have work to do to counteract the negative programming of my early years.

I can’t blame anyone or anything for whatever scarcity consciousness I’ve created for myself. So I’m currently reading, studying, doing affirmations, seminars, self reflection, self hypnosis and a lot of hard work to see if I can create a higher level of  “abundance consciousness”.

That’s my story. Next week I’ll share some of the resources I’ve been using.

Blessings and abundance to you!

To hear a podcast of this blog, go to my podcast TedinYourHead.com episode 66

Ted

Sometimes You Just Need to Let Go

Me Risking Life and Limb in Tucson AZ in 1984

Me Risking Life and Limb in Tucson AZ in 1984

During my  “cowboy” phase, while living in Arizona, I decided to try my hand at rodeo. I made up my mind to do bareback bronc riding.

This is where a rider gets on a horse (or bronc) whose only desire is to buck the bronc rider off.

With only one hand, the rider hangs on to a “rigging”, which is a handle, like on a suitcase, attached to a leather strap strapped around the horse.  To hang on, the rider wears a glove  that fits tightly into the rigging handle, secured with resin (sticky) powder. The goal is to stay on for eight seconds.

I practiced for a while on a wooden sawhorse with a rigging attached and two buddies at either end bouncing it up and down. Thinking I was ready, I went to the practice arena one night and paid ten bucks for my chance to ride a wild bronc.

My legs felt like jelly as I lowered myself onto the horse in the chute. I  jammed  my gloved hand into the rigging. Out in the arena, the pick- up man waited on his horse. The pick-up man’s job is to rescue the rider from the bronc after his eight seconds.

I nodded my head to signal that I was ready. The chute opened.  Eleven hundred pounds of horse rocketed into the arena with 130 lbs of  me  attached to it.

About 3 seconds too late, I realized that I had no business being on that horse. I was getting tossed like a rag doll in a clothes dryer.

The pick up man, seeing that I was a lost cause,  rode up next to us on the right. I started to climb onto his horse. I got half way there with one leg on when he yelled “Take your hand out of the rigging!”

In all the excitement, I had forgotten to take my left hand out of the handle of the rigging. My hand was stuck tight with resin, on the other horse, all nice and cozy, the way it was supposed to be.  Except now, it wasn’t supposed to be.

All I could do was climb back onto the bronc. After a few more bone-rattling bucks, I got my hand free and he gleefully sent me flying.

After I got all the dirt out of my mouth, and with some sense pounded into me, I decided to do horses a favor and end my rodeo career.

Sometimes you just need to let go. 

The past year is just about gone. Soon a new year will come. Things come and things go. That’s life, isn’t it?

But sometimes, caught up in the excitement (or routine) of life,  we forget that we are still holding on when we should have let go a long time ago. We can end up being dragged along by our involvement, shaken to and fro by our choices, or being owned by our physical and psychological “stuff.”

As hard as it might be, there are times when the best thing to do is let go and get off.  This is how you make yourself available for a new ride. This is how you allow new, (maybe better) stuff to come in.

Are you aware of something that needs to be released from your life, now?

  • Material things you don’t use or need
  • A job
  • A relationship
  • A desire  (like trying to ride horses that don’t want to be ridden)
  • Guilt or regret
  • A tradition
  • A belief
  • A habit

At this time of the year, trees shed their leaves as Nature prepares to create anew. Why can’t you?

Ted

To listen to a podcast of this blog, go to www.tedmoreno.com/ted-in-your-head episode 39