Thoughts About Life and Death – Episode 473

Being alive is a matter of life and death. Life happens daily but death only happens once. However, we tend to avoid the subject of our own mortality, yet, what can be more personal to us? We can’t have a life without a death.

In this episode, Ted reflects on the subject of life and death and discusses the questions: Why should we be mindful of death? How can death awareness add to our life? Why do we sometimes carry such existential fear of non-existence? How can we not be afraid of death, our own or that of those we love?

Listen to this podcast episode now:

If you watch the video of this podcast you can see me attempting to play a Japanese folk tune called Sakura Sakura (or you can hear Yo Yo Ma play it). Sakura means cherry blossom and this song is about spring and the season of the cherry blossoms. The symbolism of the cherry blossom is deeply rooted in the culture of Japan. This is because it symbolizes the transience of life and the impermanence of all things. The blossoms arise, are beautiful for a brief time, and fall too soon. They are a primary example of the concept of “mono no aware”, which is Japanese for “the beauty of passing things”.

Of course, the words to this popular song speak to the brevity of human life. We blossom in beauty and radiance for a short time and then expire.

Last week I went to two funerals. One for someone how was 97 years old and another for someone who was 42. We hope to live a long life, but we might not.  I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.

Today I want to talk about life and death.

Notice how you feel hearing the word death. Does it make you feel sad, depressed, anxious, or scared? If so, then perhaps your relationship with death could use some attention.

Why can’t we accept death like we accept that day will turn into night, summer into fall; the cycle of life: everyone that is born will die.

One of the most powerful things we can do is to come to terms with our own mortality, to accept the fact of not only our own death, but those that we love and cherish.

Now if this is really triggering for you, you might not want to continue listening to this episode…I respect that. If you are going through a grief or loss journey, this might be too hard to hear. If so, stop listening and remember that as a hypnotherapist, I have helped many clients on this journey.

I talked about this subject a bit in my podcast number 462 in November of 2024 titled: Remember What You Don’t Want to Think About: Memento Mori. Memento Mori means “remember you will die.”

Why is that something we should remember?

We should remember that we will die because there is no life without death, and there is no real living without acknowledging that it will all be done too soon, as the Neil Diamond song says. From the moment we are born, we have a relationship with death, whether we choose to acknowledge it or not. I would suggest to you that life is more precious if we can acknowledge and remember this irrefutable and inevitable fact.

Doing so can give a person a grand perspective of one’s life because we live with the certainty that tomorrow will be there, but it very well may not, tomorrow is promised to no one.

However, we don’t need to be afraid of that fact. It doesn’t need to make us depressed or anxious or fearful.

When I was a kid, maybe 5 years old, I asked my mother “Mom, am I going to die?”

“Yes,” she said, “We are all going to die.”

I cried inconsolably exclaiming “But I don’t want to die!”

She held me and told me that it was ok. Maybe that’s why I have never had an issue with the topic of death.

Our greatest problem as humas is fear and the greatest fear is the fear of nonexistence which includes the fear of death but also, the loss of a relationship, a friend or family member, pet or even a job or a house. We ask ourselves “Who am I without this ____”

Our greatest threat is the death of our ego, the idea of who we are, the fiction we have created for ourselves. It’s the construction of who we are, a description that’s always changing. The ego’s primary goal is to maintain itself at all costs. This is the root of all fear.

Once we lose the fear of death, I think life becomes sweeter. We can lose that existential dread that many of us carry. Then we’re free to enjoy life in the best way possible.

This fear of nonexistence or fear of death is quite pervasive in our culture. We don’t want to think or talk about it about it but it’s worth thinking about and definitely, talking about.

Meditation can be helpful in freeing us from fear. We can cultivate detachment from our thoughts, fears and future projections. There is a Buddhist meditation practice called maraṇasati, or mindfulness of death. It’s a meditation technique designed to increase awareness of mortality and encourage living in the present moment.

I’ve never done this but from what I know about it, it’s pretty intense. You start with imaging your own death and the process of decay, the passing time and the eventual return into dust. That’s heavy…

It’s not for everyone.  This practice is not about dwelling on fear or negativity but about cultivating mindfulness and acceptance of the natural cycle of life and death. If you look it up on Wikipedia, you’ll get a pretty good description of it.

The point is to develop compassion for all beings who must live, then die, and to have less attachment to the material world, and a greater appreciation for life.

Again, this is not for everyone. To fully accept this inevitable stage of our life requires us to have done some healing from previous loss and grief, which is a journey of its own.

Want to catch up on previous episodes?  Click Here >

Do you feel that fear of death is keeping your from living fully? Or are you experiencing loss or grief where all you want to do is stop thinking about loss? Hypnotherapy can help. Request a consultation to find out if hypnotherapy is right for you. To request your complimentary consultation, go to https://Tedmoreno.com/contact and he’ll get back to you in 48 hours to schedule your consultation.

I want to leave you with the idea that true freedom is the ability to be free from the past and free from the future, and to fully, wholly and powerfully experience this present moment so that the time you do have, is not only meaningful, but as good as you can make it.

Thanks for being here, I invite and appreciate your comments and reviews.
Ted

Photo by Dilaudid – Own work; modified from Image:Go_board.jpg, which was made by user:donarreiskoffer, CC BY-SA 3.0