Feeling Stuck? SHAKE IT UP!

This week’s post is based on a wonderful presentation given at my BNI (Business Networking International) meeting by photographer Skye Moorhead. Thanks to Skye for collaborating with me on this post.

Tony Robbins says that one of our human needs is certainty. Most of us want to know what to expect; we want to know what’s coming. But if you always know what’s going to happen, if everything in your life is predictable, then another human need kicks in: the need for uncertainty.

To feel alive, to feel like life is a grand adventure, is to live in the space between these two needs. Unfortunately, all too often we seek the security of the known and comfortable. We end up stuck in routine, doing the same thing day in and day out. Life becomes boring, our senses become dull, and we end up feeling stuck. Feeling stuck seems to be an epidemic these days. In fact, there’s even a recent book called  “Stuck: Why We Can’t (or Won’t) Move On”by Anneli Rufus.

If you feel shackled to inertia and the air in your space is stale, then you need a fresh new breeze in your head. You need to S-H-A-K-E  I-T  U-P.

S: Stay Present. Let go of any assumption of how the next moment is going to be. Realize it’s always new: this present moment. Turn off the auto pilot, take control of your own perception and be aware of what’s in front of you. Engage your senses, pay attention to subtleties. Try to keep your mind more on the journey than the destination. Practice this enough and you’ll begin to realize that you don’t have a life; you are life.

H: Have An Open Mind. Being receptive to alternative points of view or experiences creates a space for serendipity, which is defined as the propensity for making fortuitous discoveries while looking for something unrelated. Ask questions and listen to the answers. Where in your life can you let go of having the end in mind? There you will find possibility.

A: Alternative Points of View. How can you look differently at challenges or situations in your life? Can you try a worm’s eye view? What about a bird’s eye view? Are you able to focus on the windshield instead of the road? How does this change your perception? Do you really understand the point of view of your children? What would you look like on a video camera taped to your dog’s head?  How are you being perceived by others around you? Do you know? Try asking.

K: Keep it Simple. Don’t  over think. Life at it’s basis is simple. Sometimes good enough is good enough, perfection is the enemy of good. Perfection tires things out and chases away newness. Walk away and come back later. The more complicated you make anything the more energy is required and the more your mind is pulled away from what’s going on in front of you. Less is often enough and more often, it’s more. Get it?

E: Embrace the Unexpected. The unexpected will happen. See detours as doorways out of habit. Remember that everything is energy and energy is always changing. Be fluid in your thinking and you will find great potential there. Life can be absurd, learn to embrace it, sometimes there is no apparent reason for events.

I: Involve Others. Nobody does it by themselves. Be willing to admit you don’t know, but choose who you listen to carefully and allow for synergy. Actively seek out what others think. Remember, two heads are better than one, sometimes three better than two.

T: Take Note. Make a conscious effort to remember by observing  and recording.  Keep a journal where you only write really cool stuff. Write down what excites you. When you think it, ink it. You don’t need to remember why it stopped you: a turn of a phrase, a new song, a recommended book or film, a combination of flavors, a great website. Write it down and look it up.

U: Upend the Expected. Cultivate a “devil may care” attitude for when you need it. Take a risk and say what you really think. If you are always appropriate then be the opposite. Jump out of the box, hang around outside for while. Eat breakfast for dinner. Try things in a new way, have a picnic in your backyard. Dare to be different.

P: Press Past Your First Idea. Don’t get attached to an immediate solution. You may think it’s brilliant but what if you took it out a couple of steps beyond? Brainstorm many solutions quickly, use a flip chart or whiteboard, writed down keywords. Thinking out loud can be incredbly productive. Don’t be afraid to cut your losses, or to give up time invested if it’s not working, whether it’s a business card or a marriage. In the grand scheme of things, consider that nothing is ever wasted, nothing ever lost. You are always free to choose.

Did you get any good ideas? Pick two or three and practice for the next week and see what happens. Life is waiting for you.

Skye Moorhead is a photographer based in Los Angeles and educated at the Otis College of Art and Design. She specializes in portraits and architecture. Contact Skye at (626) 824-5074 or at [email protected]. See Skye’s photography at www.skyemoorhead.com.

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TMan