Your Word Can Move Mountains: Five Steps to Integrity

One recent hot weekend my family and I were checking out the pond at the Santa Anita Botanical Gardens. My youngest daughter, The Rock, started to insist “I want to go swimming!” Back in the car, she became even more insistent. We were on our way to my parents’ house, so  I told her “I give you my word that we’ll go swimming in the pool at Grandma’s house.”

Within minutes of arriving at my parent’s house, The Rock and Chicklet (my older daughter) had their swim suits on and were jumping up and down with excitement. “Can we go swimming?” “In a minute”, I said. I didn’t feel like going back into the sun. I’d already sat down, cracked a cold one, and was feeling cool and comfortable. Soon they were playing with their cousins as if they had  forgotten about the pool.  For a second I considered telling them that it was too late to go swimming but instead I jumped up and took them out into the pool. I had given them my word. How do I teach them if I can’t stick to my word?

It’s said the talk is cheap but the truth is that people cheapen talk. Consider that if you regularly cheapen your talk, then you cheapen the quality of your life.

We all know people who “are all talk”. When they say they are going to do something, we pay no attention, because they always say things but don’t deliver. On the other hand, we know people whose word is their bond. They say “I’ll be there at ten o’clock” and we know that come hell or high water they’ll be there because that’s how that person always is. We can say that person has integrity.

According to to Wikipedia:

The word “integrity” stems from the Latin adjective integer (whole, complete). In this context, integrity is the inner sense of “wholeness” deriving from qualities such as honesty and consistency of character. As such, one may judge that others “have integrity” to the extent that one judges whether they behave according to the values, beliefs and principles they claim to hold.

In other words, integrity is consistency between what one says and what one does.

Words can be incredibly powerful and creative.I’ve heard it said that there is no reality without language. If that statement is true, and I believe it is, then nothing happens without you first speaking it into existence. In Genesis 1:1 it’s written “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” The Bible goes on to say that God spoke the universe into creation.

In last week’s post I talked about declaring yourself to be who you want to be before the doing and having. In the declaring of who you are, you start to create who you want to be. This is  the power of your word.

The power of our word is developed first with ourselves by being in integrity with ourselves.  It’s easier for us to keep our promises to others than it is for us to keep promises to ourselves. Have you ever made a promise to yourself, knowing deep down inside that you probably won’t keep it? I know I have.  This is deadly, for two reasons: one, we can trick ourselves into believing we have integrity when we don’t. Second, what integrity we do have will always depend on what we commit to others. Truth be told, the most powerful promises we make are those we make to ourselves and keep.

When we commit to being a person of integrity, then our word starts to become powerful because we consistently do what we way we will do. In time, we come to trust that when we commit to something, it WILL happen. This is called creating your life through your speaking. “This I shall do” becomes not just a promise but the starting point, or genesis of what you will accomplish.

Eventually we can develop our integrity to the point where if we want to create something, we simply speak our intention and it begins to manifest it in physical reality. We know it will come to pass because we have created our word as powerful. Others know it as well. Our reputation becomes such: “If he said it was going to happen, then you better count on it happening.”

At this point, the speaking of something and the creating of it become one. We then have a clear sense of our own personal power and a deep belief in our ability to create whatever we want to create.

Here are five steps to developing the power of your word and creating yourself as someone with unshakable integrity.

1. Start small. Commit to something you are going to do daily. Keep it simple. It could be reading for 5 minutes or sweeping the floor. Calling your mother, anything.  Try to do it for 21 days. If you really want to put yourself out there, commit to doing it at a particular time. The point is to get in the habit of doing what you say you are going to do.
2. Clean up where you are out of integrity with yourself.Again, start with something small. Maybe your promised yourself you were going to work out three times a week but have yet to start. Simply acknowledge that you are out of integrity with yourself without shame or blame then recommit to something that you CAN do, that is realistic. Maybe one time a week. Or, choose consciously NOT to work out. Maybe it’s not something you are truly committed to and that’s ok. Be complete with it.
3. Clean up where you are out of integrity with others.This might be tough but it’s essential. What have you promised  to someone that you haven’t completed? This might involve an apology, re-negotiation, or fulfilling the promise. Leaving these things dangling can be a heavy burden on your mind.
4. Declare that you are going to do something big and audacious. You don’t need to know how you’re going to do it, just commit. Make yourself accountable to someone. It’s gotta be big! Do this then see what happens…
5. Realize and accept that you will fall out of integrity. You will break your word. It’s what humans do. Don’t make it mean anything. Re-commit, re-negotiate, clean it up, and move on.

If your talk is so cheap that even your dog rolls his eyes when you speak, then you need help. I’m giving $100 off of my four session hypnotherapy package if you call before August 13 to book an appointment. Make your word a force to be reckoned with.

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TMan