How I Found My Path – Episode 500

It seems that more and more people are not content just to have a “job”.

In previous generations, you were lucky just having a job, whether you liked it or not.

However, today, with so many more choices to make a living, a path of enjoyable and meaningful work is something that we can strive for.

In this episode, Ted talks about the difficulties he experienced on his journey to becoming a hypnotherapist, the commitment he had to make to see it through, and the shift in thinking that made the difference between struggle and ease.

If you’re struggling to find your path, perhaps this episode with give you some hope and inspiration.

Listen to this podcast episode now:

 

Last week I sent an email to my list of clients talking about how my life changed the day I enrolled in the Hypnosis Motivation Institute, where I received my training and where I am a senior staff instructor.

(By the way, if you want to get on my email list go to https://tedmoreno.com, and scroll down to “Sign Up for My Newsletter”. In return I’ll give you my “Peaceful Place” relaxation mp3.)

In response to that email, I received several responses from people who had found their path or were still struggling to find it. It seems that a lot of people related to my brief story of how I started my career as a hypnotherapist.

I think the reason for that is that there are many out there who are looking for their own meaningful path. I’ve had clients who are close to retirement tell me, “I’m trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up!”

I’m lucky, I found my path and although nothing is ever perfect, it’s a lot better than I thought it could be.

So today, I want to tell you the story of how I found my path. My hope is that if you are still looking for work that is meaningful and fulfilling, it might inspire you to not give up.

I grew up in East Los Angeles as the oldest of eight kids. Dad owned two businesses and Mom stayed home.

I saw my dad working all the time, money was always tight, and my mom and dad argued a lot.

Owning a business did not look fun to me. There was nothing I saw out there that I wanted to do as a career or job.

After graduating from high school, I went to a small college in LA and majored in music, because it was the only thing I cared about.

In 1980 I moved to Tucson and attended the University of Arizona. I tried to continue as a music major, but it wasn’t going to happen for me. I had little discipline and no foundation in music theory or practice.

I was broke and needed to get a job, so I dropped out of college and started working. I was tired of being broke all the time.

I had a series of jobs, none that I would consider a career, and I didn’t really like any of them.

In 1990, I met a woman, fell in love and in a very short time, watched my relationship fall apart in a most devastating way.

I was so distraught that I put myself in therapy and joined some groups to help me deal with what I was feeling. After a series of failed relationships, the big question I had was “What’s wrong with me?”

I started taking a good long look at myself. I realized that my self-esteem wasn’t where it needed to be. I saw that I used relationships as a drug to cover up my low self-worth.

I had no goals, no vision, and no real ambition. That bothered me.

This most difficult period of my life turned out to be a gift. I started working on myself, reading books, doing affirmations, attending seminars and taking a deep interest in my own personal self-development.

In 2000 I made the difficult decision to move back to Los Angeles.

I loved the desert where I lived, but nothing was happening for me in Tucson.

My parents were getting older, I missed my brothers and sister, and I felt that I really needed to be closer to my extended family of aunts, uncles and cousins in LA.

Before I moved back, a friend of mine from high school offered me a job at an organization that he was directing.

I’m grateful to that person for giving me the opportunity to move back and have a job, but again, it was just for the paycheck and I wanted more.

Not more money necessarily, but more meaning. I needed to do something that mattered.

My biggest fear was getting stuck in a job that I wasn’t happy with and not being able to leave because of financial obligations.

First world problems, right?

In my parents’ generation, you were just lucky to have work; liking it wasn’t a consideration. But it was for me, and that wasn’t something I could ignore.

By 2003 I was getting desperate. I was engaged to be married but I was very unhappy with my job. I didn’t know what I was going to do or how I was going to support a family and I was starting to feel like a real loser with no prospects for a career that I cared about.

Then, fate intervened. My co-workers and I were sent offsite to attend a one-day seminar.  I think it was called “How to Be a Better Communicator”.

The woman facilitating the seminar mentioned that she was a hypnotherapist, so during the break, I went and spoke with her.

She told me that she had received her training at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute and that  I should go there and check it out.

Now, here’s something ironic: I had heard of HMI. I had seen the ads in the paper. But I felt that Tarzana, about 50 miles from where I lived, was too far to drive.

However, the next day, I did drive there and I did check it out. I saw an opportunity for me to do something that mattered. I knew that this was something that I could do.

I enrolled and started my training.

Here’s the most important thing I want to share with you: I didn’t have a “Plan B”.

There were no other choices for me. I was 43 years old. I was so desperate, and so ready to make something happen that I made a commitment to finish the program and start a career as a hypnotherapist in private practice. There really was no other option for me.

The first thing I did was to go to the hypnotherapist that I met at the seminar and start getting hypnotherapy sessions to give me determination, persistence and the belief that I could pull this off.

One of the suggestions that she gave me back in 2003 while I was in hypnosis was that maybe I would teach there someday.

Today, I’ve been a senior staff instructor there for 10 years now.

In closing, I want to say that the purpose of this post is not to toot my own horn.

I’ve been lucky. I found my path and it has been a “path with a heart”, as the writer Carlos Castaneda calls it.

• But I had to be patient.
• I had to resist the temptation to beat myself up.
• I had to keep looking.
• I had to make a commitment.

 It’s so fulfilling to have people tell me, “You’ve changed my life.”

I always reply, “No YOU did it!”

It’s so gratifying to sit in front of my clients and give them my full attention and listening. To create the trust that allows them to tell me their deepest fears along with their greatest desires.

There was a time when I was much younger man, in my 20s, when what drove me was making a ton of money. That never worked for me. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

However, when I decided that I wanted to be of service, that’s when things started happening for me.

If you are looking for your path, don’t give up. Keep looking. Keep exploring. Some paths will have dead ends and you’ll walk away from some paths with only lessons from your failures but that’s ok.

If you’re listening to this, then I’m assuming that you’re like me: wanting to do something that matters.

Seek to make a difference. Seek to serve. Within you lies a contribution that only you can make. Whatever that contribution is, the world needs it more badly than ever.

Keep knocking on the door, keep asking, keep seeking with hope and faith that you’ll find what you’re looking for.

I’ll leave you with a quote from William Hutchison Murray who was a Scottish Mountaineer and writer. This is an awesome quote.

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.”

 

Thanks for reading.

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Take care,

Ted