Fear of Public Speaking: Worse than Death?

Fear of public speaking is a fear worse than death

I’ll help you get out of that speech…

 

It’s been said that fear of public speaking is a fear worse than death for some people.

I’m not sure how many people have the fear of public speaking so bad that they would rather die, but many people do consider speaking in front of a group on par with a root canal on the list of their favorite activities.

Nobody is born a good public speaker. As with all fears, fear of public speaking is learned, and what is learned can be unlearned. When someone says “I have a fear of public speaking because I’m not a good speaker” all they are really saying is “I haven’t developed the skills to be an effective speaker.” Becoming comfortable in front of a group is a skill you can learn.

You may someday be called upon to speak to a group, maybe at a wedding or funeral. In today’s business environment, you will almost certainly be required to give reports or presentations to colleagues or clients. If so, consider learning to speak in public as necessary part of your personal and professional development.

If you are someone who gets the fight or flight response (sweaty palms, rapid heartbeat, shallow breathing, inability to think clearly) when asked to speak to a group, the good news is that you can learn to overcome the fear response and speak comfortably. It doesn’t  have to be  stressful. Many people who once suffered from fear of  public speaking  have gone on to become very good speakers.  Here are some other things to remember:

  •  You don’t have to be a master orator in order to be effective. You just need to be yourself. Don’t try to be or think of yourself as a “public speaker”.
  • The audience is on your side, wanting you to succeed.
  • The chances of you loudly passing gas, fainting, throwing up, totally forgetting what you were going to say or  the audience throwing stuff at you rarely happens and if it does, you can probably make a joke out of it.
  • You don’t need to memorize a lot of information or even impart a lot of information. That’s what notes and handouts  are for.
  • It’s ok to feel a little nervous, that’s natural.

Of course, there are different levels of fear of public speaking. On one end of the spectrum, you might be challenged by social anxiety disorder to the point where even talking to someone one on one is a problem. On the other end, you may feel  fear or nervousness that makes the prospect of public speaking just another stressful thing  in  your life. Either way, if you want some help, click here to contact me.

Tips for dealing with fear of public speaking

  •  Practice but don’t over- prepare. Have an outline for what you are going to say. Put your notes on 3×5 index cards that are numbered in order. Practice saying the words out loud. Practice in front of someone you trust that can give you some feedback is one of the best ways to deal with fear of public speaking. Record yourself to see what vocal tics you might want to work with. Practice in front of a mirror.
  • Don’t be boring. The worst sin you can commit as a speaker is making people wish they were somewhere else. Although there are many situations where one may need to speak, try to craft your message to your audience so that what you tell them has some impact on them.
  • Humor is good. People want to laugh, and when they do, you’ll  feel a lot more comfortable. Just use common sense to avoid offending your audience.
  • Humility is good. Don’t try to come across as an expert if you aren’t. Even if you are, remember, people don’t care how much you know unless they know how much you care.
  • Make sure you eat something. Diet and your level of anxiety are intimately related. Don’t go in front of a group on an empty stomach or over-caffeinated.
  • Monitor the conversation in your head so that it supports you. It doesn’t help to say things like “I just know I’m going to screw this up.” or “I have so much fear of public speaking!”. Be realistic in your expectations and show this in your language to yourself. “I can do this, it’s only ten minutes.”  or “This is a great opportunity to show my stuff.”
  • Do a little mental preparation before you speak. Psyche yourself up, see yourself doing great, give yourself some positive suggestions.
  • Use EFT to release anxiety.

I help people  let go of the anxiety and  fear of public speaking that keeps them from getting ahead. If you want to excel as a public speaker, there’s a lot of instructional material out there including books, DVDs and audio programs.   Toastmasters is the most well known and respected venue for people to hone their skills, and I highly recommend that you check out your local chapter. Check out Barbara Rocha’s programs as well. If you have a fear of public speaking, you CAN learn to be comfortable whenever you’re called upon to “show your stuff.”

Ted

If you want to hear a podcast of this blog with a funny story, go to tedmoreno.com/podcast, episode 32.

Click Here For a Free Guide to Relieve Anxiety

 

The Story of The 2 Boxes and Releasing Limitations

releasing limitations

Let me tell you the story of the 2 boxes.

There are 2 boxes that exist in everyone’s life.

The 1st box represents a person’s actual limitations.

For instance, I will probably never play center for the Los Angeles Lakers.

Why?

Because I’m not 7 feet tall, and don’t play basketball.

See?

That’s an actual, physical limitation.

And of course, everyone has this box in their lives.

However, there’s a 2nd box that exists in everyone’s lives – and this 2nd box represents a person’s PERCEIVED limitations.

This 2nd box is created by all the doubts, fears, and insecurities a person has.

  • “I can’t ever be relaxed and have fun…I have too much anxiety…”
  • I can’t make a lot of money… I just not greedy enough…smart enough…motivated enough…”
  • “I can’t be in a relationship…too many issues…too much fear…”
  • “I can’t ever be confident enough to speak in public…I’m just too nervous…”
  • “I can’t ever quit smoking…I just don’t have the willpower…”

The sad part?

The 2nd box is usually MUCH smaller than the 1st box!

Meaning, it’s often our own doubts, fears, and insecurities that hold us back from claiming the success we desire so much!

Meaning, you are capable of so much more than you think you are!

Meaning, you can overcome most – if not ALL – of the challenges you come across in whatever it is that you choose to take on.

But most people let their self-imposed 2nd box create an imaginary barrier between them and their success and happiness!

The reality?

This 2nd box usually doesn’t exist!

So the next time you encounter a challenge on your way to doing what you really want to do, have or be, think of the 2 boxes.

Is your challenge created by a real limitation?

Or are you constraining yourself with a self-imposed 2nd box?

Now, there are many tools and resources available to help you begin releasing limitations and vaporize your self-imposed 2nd box.

You just have to be aware of these resources when you come across them.

Releasing Limitations Using the Moreno Method

For example, you can give me a call, and using the Moreno Method for Life Transformation, I can help you start releasing limitations that are holding you back.

I’ll ask you to make a commitment to yourself to take action on your dreams, goals and desires.

Afterwards, I’ll send you home with a recording to listen to that will begin to reprogram your mind for success at whatever you choose to do.

I’ll even call you to check in and provide accountability and coaching.

So if you’ve ever been frustrated that you can’t even get started down the road to doing what you really want to do, whether it’s gaining confidence, getting healthier or making more money, then that reasoning has just become a 2nd box limitation.

I want to help you vaporize that 2nd box so that it never stops you again.

Then you can now simply reach out and claim your success.

Questions? Want to talk about the possibilities that exist for you after releasing limitations? Click here to get in touch with me. Time to get out of that box!

Ted

Is Your Self Expression Waiting to Get Out?

megaphone

One Sunday when I was about 6 or 7 years old, I was sitting with my dad in church. As a kid I always had a stuffy nose and my nose was kind of running while I was sitting there. I didn’t have a kleenex  and I didn’t know what to do.

I know this is kinda of gross, but I was a little kid, so I wiped my nose with the inside of my hand and wiped it on my pants. Then I became really uncomfortable and my nose was still running. I started to get more and more miserable  by the second as I wiped my nose again with my hand and wiped it on my pants. I was beside myself with shame and embarrassment and I wanted to cry. I guess I spoke up or my dad noticed and he offered my a hanky, which I accepted with relief and gratitude. “Why didn’t you say something?” he asked me. I didn’t answer because I really didn’t know why.

Now I know. Read more

Self Hypnosis and the Stars

Celebrities have used hypnosis or self hypnosis for relaxation, career success and to quit smoking. Why not learn this valuable tool for yourself?

You can! Register for the Self Hypnosis for Success Class being offered again at Pasadena City College starting  Saturday, January 24th, and continuing for the next two Saturdays: January 31st and February 7th  from 9 am to 10:30 am. Click here to register!

You can use this valuable tool to:

  • Overcome bad habits such as procrastination
  • Gain confidence
  • Increase motivation
  • Release limiting beliefs
  • Achieve business success
  • Release fear and anxiety
  • And much more!

Reserve your spot by clicking here.

In this class, you will learn:

  • What hypnosis is and isn’t
  • How to do a hypnotic induction on yourself
  • Crafting suggestions to put into your subconscious mind
  • How to put it all together to reprogram your subconscious mind for success in just a few minutes a day
  • Little known, yet powerful tips and techniques for keeping your mind sharp, powerful and positive! (Most of this valuable information I only share with clients paying me $137 a session.)

You’ll receive my Guide to Self Hypnosis and my Self Hypnosis Conditioning CD, which also includes my studio produced “Peaceful Place” relaxation track as an added bonus. In addition, you’ll get handouts at each class containing the material presented. Click here to register.

Here are some comments from the course evaluations I’ve received from previous classes:

  • “Has really motivated me  to improve from day one. Very well organized.”
  • “The whole class was wonderful!”
  • “…so much motivational talk -that was great!
  • “The class is perfect!”

Why do the rich and famous become rich and famous? Well, there are many reasons, but first and foremost, they knew what they wanted, they believed they could get it and they took ACTION. This is called a “success mindset” and you can have it too by using the powerful tool of self hypnosis.

A subconscious mind is a terrible thing to waste! Put it to work for you.  Click here to register for Self Hypnosis for Success.

How to Memorize and Present in Public Powerfully and Effectively.

At some point most people will be asked to speak in public, whether it’s a wedding toast, funeral eulogy, or for business. Then there are those of us who actively seek out opportunities to speak for the purpose of communicating a message that we feel needs to be heard or that is necessary for our livelihood.

As a hypnotherapist and success performance coach, I’ve worked successfully with presenters to help them deliver their message much more powerfully and effectively. One such person is Libbe Halevy. (Libbe has graciously given me her permission to use her story and feature her video presentation.)

Libbe HaLevy is a Communications and Creativity expert, and dedicated anti-nuclear activist. She recently had the opportunity to speak at the recent TEDxPasadena conference. TEDx is a locally organized event licensed by TED that brings people together to share a TED-like experience. TED stands for Technology, Education and Development and is an internationally renowned platform for “Ideas Worth Spreading.” (Although Ms. HaLevy had a Ted hypnotherapy experience, neither TED nor TEDx is associated with Ted A. Moreno–aka, me.)

Libbe came to me with the goal of giving a top notch professional presentation that was dynamic, interesting and informative. She had compelling information, the speech was well written and she is an experience public speaker.  However, she needed to have the nearly 20-minute speech completely memorized, could not use notes, and had to deliver it within an allotted time frame. I worked with Libbe for one session. Watch the video to see the results.

One of the qualities of a top notch presenter is the ability to speak without notes. Memorization can be a daunting task to many, but it gets easier with practice. Here are some tips: Read more

Are You A DIY? Attend my Self Hypnosis Class Starting 10/23 at PCC

 

If you are a DIY (Do It Yourselfer) then you might be interested in taking my Self Hypnosis for Success Class at PCC starting October 23rd and continuing for the next three Saturdays: October 30th and November 6th from 9 am to 10:30 am. Click here to register!

All hypnosis is self hypnosis, so in this class you’ll learn to use this valuable tool to address a variety of concerns including: overcoming bad habits such as procrastination, gaining confidence, increasing motivation, releasing limiting beliefs and business success. We’ll cover what hypnosis is and isn’t, how to do a hypnotic induction on yourself, crafting suggestions and how to put it all together to reprogram your subconsious mind for success in just a few minutes a day.

You’ll receive a course syllabus as well as my Guide to Self Hypnosis and my Self Hypnosis Conditioning CD, which also includes my studio produced “Peaceful Place” relaxation track as an added bonus.

This will be the third time I’m offering this class, and so far I’ve recieved great response. Here are some comments from the course evaluations I received from the  class held in January 2010:

  • Ted is very knowledgable and enthusiastic about his field. It really helped me a lot.”
  • “It actually works!”
  • “Professional, organized and informative. The instructor was engaging and knew his subject well. I’m glad I took the course!”
  • “Clear and easy guidelines to follow. Instructor is knowledgable and well experienced.”
  • “Ted is dynamic and makes an effort to engage the students. The content was well delivered.”

Remember, you’re being hypnotized daily, through advertising, the media, and the people you spend time with. In addition, you’ve been hypnotized throughout your life to believe things about yourself and the world that may or may not work for you anymore. The good news is, you can take control of your own positive programming. If you have habits of thinking and behaving that are holding you back from the success and happiness that you want, then you can learn to use the power of your own mind to change. Click here to register!

If you’re not interested in learning self-hypnosis but believe that hypnosis can be of help to you, give me a call and I’ll give you a free half hour consultation to discuss how you can benefit from working with me as your hypnotherapist or personal/small business coach. Call (626) 826-0612, email hypnosis@tedmoreno.com or click here.

A subconscious mind is a terrible thing to waste! Put it to work for you with self hypnosis. Click here to register.