Opening the Door to Success:GOALS (Guarantee Overcoming Anything Limiting Success)

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My four-year old daughter who I call The Chick asked me the other day when she could ride her new tricycle. “Tomorrow” I replied. “But Dad” she exclaimed, Tomorrow’s a long time!” 

If only that were still true. If you’re like most people, the things you were going to do tomorrow keep piling up as quick as the days pass. You’ve heard it before: “I was going to do it but life got in the way.” 

That’s why only 44% of Americans bother to make New Years Resolutions. The rest have decided they don’t work. Like like banging your head against the wall, it accomplishes nothing except to give you a headache. In fact, instead of making resolutions, it might just be better to bang your head against the wall and save your self-esteem the beating you might give it when you find that your resolutions have fallen by the wayside. 

Hey, if you made some New Years resolutions, good for you. However, if you want to make any lasting change, there’s a strategy for doing  it and “resolving” to change is not it.   I suggest that we throw out New Years resolutions (if you haven’t already) and institute “New Year’s Goals.” 

In last week’s edition of Ted’s Tips for Transformation, I revealed what I believe is the key to success: knowing what you want. That’s the first step, the key that opens the door. 

The next step is where 90% of people stumble. You must take your thought or resolution about what you want and turn it into a goal. What’s the difference? 

First of all, a your must write down your goal or it is just a wish. Sometimes wishes come true (sorry Jiminy Cricket) but they have a better chance if you write them down as a goal. Get yourself a notebook or  journal and write down what you want to have, do or who you want to be. If you are serious about this goal, then it becomes a project, something you attend to daily, (kind of like having a kid). Dedicate a notebook or journal to this project. 

Now, you may have a number of things that you want.  The key here is to ask yourself, “What am I willing to commit to as a goal?” Focus on goals that will have the most impact on your life and that you feel you can reasonably get started on now. Some of your goals may not be fully formed or that you think you’d like to do but are not fully committed. Put those in a “later” or “back-burner” category. 

Okay, so now maybe you have three or four goals that you can focus on and commit to right away. You may have heard of the SMART formula for goals. What you want to do now is to set your goals using the SMART formula: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Timetable.  

  1. Specific. What exactly do you want to accomplish? Be very clear. Describe it exactly. “In 2010, I am doubling last year’s income” is a lot better than “I want more money.” As Tony Robbins would say to that, “Here’s a dollar, get outta here!”  Make sure you state them positively, for example, don’t say, “I don’t want to feel strapped financially anymore”
  2. Measurable. How will you know when it’s achieved? How will you track your progress? If a goal is measurable, then the results you want will be clear in your mind.
  3. Attainable. You must believe that it is possible for you to get what you want. Develop a written plan for achieving your goal so that you have a roadmap that confirms in your mind that there is a way to get what you want. Also, identify roadblocks and obstacles that may come up and how you can overcome them.
  4. Realistic.  Be honest with yourself. Is it really something you want, or something you think you should have? Is this goal realistic for what is going on in your life? Is it consistent with your values? If not, then it’s not realistic.
  5. Timetable. When will you have it? Put some urgency on it by assigning a deadline. Many folks don’t like deadlines. Why? Because it puts pressure on them to perform. That’s exactly the reason you want deadlines. Deadlines act on you, affecting your body chemistry to react to the timetable you’ve set. They prepare your body, your mind and your attitudes to respond effectively. They create a challenge and help support a positive attitude. Don’t underestimate the power of a timetable.

That’s what you’ve got to do to guarantee the highest chance of success for your goals. Sounds like work? You betcha. Do it anyway, I know you’re up for it. 

Next week we’ll talk about who you have to Be to get what you want. If you like this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks. 

Here’s to getting what you intend in 2010!, 

TMan (the T stands for Transformation, what else?) 

Ted A. Moreno, C.Ht., Goal Achievement Specialist
www.TedMoreno.com

                                                                     

  

The Key to Success Is…

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Before I tell you what I think the key to success is, let me tell you a story.

My wife and I were shopping for a house in early 2009.  We had been looking for more than a couple of years. It was at times a grueling experience. We often had to do this after work, dragging our two small daughters along, all of us tired and hungry. Tired and hungry kids in an empty house with nothing to do mixed with tired and hungry parents trying to talk to a realtor can be a lethal combination.

 We  looked at condos. We looked at houses with 1 bedroom and 1 bath and we looked at 2 bedroom, 2 baths. We looked at houses with big yards, little yards and no yard,  garage/no garage, we looked at everything but couldn’t find someting we liked.  It was at times very discouraging.

Most of the time I was highly resistant to the whole process. Although buying a house seemed like a good idea, it seemed to be almost not worth the hassle. My wife, God bless her, did most of the work, dealing with listings, realtors, appointments and paperwork. 

By early 2009, the economy had gone to hell, and home prices had hit bottom. We stopped looking at condos and started focusing on single family homes.  We looked at more houses: some with big yards, some with no yards, garage, no garage. It was then we decided that a yard was important for our kids and that a garage was necessary for storage.

To make a long story short, we continued to make decisions about what we were looking for. Eventually, we became clear about what we wanted: a two bedroom, two bath house with a yard and detached garage, and possibly a spare bedroom/office for the only guy in the family to go hide out in when the female energy got too intense. We submitted some offers. At this point, I made the decision to let go of my resistance to the process of home buying, and focus instead on the outcome: having our own home.

I believe it was in late February that we walked into a house built in 1946 that had two bedrooms, two baths, a large yard,  a detached garage, as well as a bonus room that could be used as an office. We are living in that house today.

The moral of the story? The more clear we became about what we wanted in a house, the easier the process got and the quicker we moved towards getting what we wanted.

I believe that the key to success is knowing what you want.

Sounds simple, doesn’t it? Yet, I would say that very few people really know what they want. They are pulled this way and that way by the desire of the moment. They let their focus  get pulled away from what they want by the multitude of distractions that our modern life offers. The key to living a successful life is to decide what you want and go after it.

What is success? I think the best definition I’ve heard comes from
Paul J. Meyer who says: Success is the progressive realization of personal, predetermined, worthwhile goals. According to this definition, if you know what you want, and are taking steps to get it, then you are a success.

Notice we are talking about the key to success. Knowing what you want is the key because it opens the door. But that’s only part of the process. The other part is you must take action by walking through the door. In other words, when you decide what you want, you won’t waste time on doors, or paths that don’t lead you where you want to go. The latin root of the word decide means to “cut away” This implies that you cut away various other distractions, alternatives, and temporary desires, leaving you to focus on one thing only: what it is that you want.

Spend some time thinking about what it is that you want. Write your thoughts down on paper or use a journal. I’ve been using a flip chart and a whiteboard which is really helpful since I tend to be visual.

In the coming weeks we’ll talk about the power of goals in helping you get what you want. Fow now, just remember, all accomplishment starts with a decision. Decide what it is that you want. That’s the first step.

What Lies Dormant Within You?

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360px-Snowed-in_tree_in_Hermiston

When I was living in Arizona, I tried to make it a point to come to Los Angeles every year at the holidays to see my family for three or four days. I’d stay at my parent’s house; the house in which I grew up.

During the day, both my folks would be at work, and since the other birds (my siblings) had long since flown the coop, there was just me hanging out.

I’m a person who enjoys solitude, so I always looked forward to that time. I would walk from room to room in my parents’ house,  looking at framed photos, thinking about all the time that had passed since I had left to be on my own. I’d think about my childhood, and people I’d lost touch with.  Sometimes I’d read, or play my guitar, or just sit and think in the quiet stillness.

One day I went out to the backyard to walk around and noticed one of the trees had completely lost all it’s leaves. All that remained were sticks. It looked dead. I remembered that the last time I had visited LA, in spring, it was big and full and had flowers on it. I wondered, “What’s  keeping it alive?” What was going in on there? It occurred to me that maybe the tree was like me, just kind of hanging out and being quiet for a while. A crazy thought occurred to me, that maybe the tree was reflecting on its life, in anticipation of the burst of energy that is Spring, in the revolving cycle of the seasons.

December 21st is the shortest day of the year, the winter Solstice. There’s that sense of dormancy, quiet, shutting down for a while. I think it serves us to take a cue from nature and do the same.

I invite and encourage you to take some quiet time to reflect over the past year and get in touch with what is possible for you in the future. Focus on the good stuff that happened to you.  Get a journal or some paper. Ask yourself some questions about the past year and write down the answers:

  • What challenges did you overcome?
  • What challenges stopped you?
  • What did you accomplish?
  • What remains left undone?
  • What did you learn?
  • What potential became real in your life?
  • Who have you become that you were not one year ago?

I think there’s great value in doing this. You can become present to your own self-development and growth.

But I think the most important question to ask yourself during this introspective time of year is this:

What lies dormant within me that is ready to awake?

See yourself as part of the cycle of the seasons. We all get our leaves stripped off of us at times. Sometimes we feel that we will be taken down by the winds of circumstance and change. But we can come back with renewed energy and life. It’s in our nature. Be at peace now with what happened over the past year. It’s done, it’s over. Take the seeds of growth that were given to you, take the lessons, the wisdom and the learning, plant them in your mind and move forward.

Get really clear about what you want  for your life. Maybe you are unsure, but as Les Brown suggests, tell yourself “It’s possible!” Everybody talks about taking massive action. For now, do some massive dreaming! Consider that what you thought wasn’t  possible for you in the past is no longer valid because you are not that person anymore. You have a whole year of new experiences, wisdom and learning. What are you ready for now that you weren’t ready for previously? How are you stronger and more prepared to take something on, to be more engaged with life, to play a bigger, more confident game? I guarantee you that there is something: writing a book, learning an instrument, learning a language, stepping into a new relationship or recreating an existing one,  a new job, greater health, prosperity, happiness. Discover it. You may have to dig a little in some cold and frozen soil but it’s there.  It’s waiting.

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks.

Dedicated to helping you move to your next level of greatness,

TMan

 Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
www.TedMoreno.com                                                                       
 (626) 826-0612

The Magic Thirty Minutes to Control Your Mind

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Greetings! I hope everyone enjoyed their Independence Day festivities.

What is independence? Well, it’s freedom, isn’t it? Freedom to call your own shots, to be the master of your destiny, to have control over your life. In my opinion, the  place to start creating that  freedom is in our own minds. We all seek  freedom from our own bad habits. Often it feels that we’re not really free to create what we want in our lives because we can’t seem to get past  our own self limiting and self defeating behaviors.

In my work as a hypnotherapist, as well as my own personal life, I’m always on the lookout for ways to create habits that empower me and help me get closer to my goals. Although there are many different modalities and techniques, I find that affirmations such as I described in my last post seem a fairly simple and easy way point my mind in the direction I want it to go.

Remember, we are all in hypnosis on a daily basis; half an hour after we wake up, and half an hour before we go to sleep. Our subconscious minds are suggestible at these times so why not give ourselves some positive suggestions? These are the magic 30 minutes to take control of your mind. This is when you want to read motivational or positive material. This is the time to  read and say your affirmations. Your mind is open to suggestions at these times, be careful what you put into it!! The absolute last thing you want to do is to watch your local news before bed and hear about how many people were murdered or assaulted in your city. Make no mistake about it, this is often the leading story of the nightly news, and for good reason: to capture your attention and keep you watching. Read or listen to something that educates, motivates or inspires you instead.

Last week I talked about handwriting your affirmations. Handwriting is more of a right brain function, where as printing is more of a left brain function. We have a tendency to use our left brain function more often as this is the logical, linear side of the brain. However, it is the right side of the brain that is creative and intuitive. This is a  generalization as both types of functions can span hemispheres. The point is that by handwriting it is possible to stimulate the creative part of our brain to find solutions to challenges that stand in the way of our success.  We know from graphology, (handwriting analysis) that much of our personality comes out in our handwriting. I believe it goes the other way as well; what we write can affect our subconscious minds. Handwriting  what you want within half an hour before bed and half an hour of waking up can be a powerful way to affect your mind and program it for success. Try it for 30 days and see what happens, using the same affirmations each day.

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks.  

Tman

 Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
Specializing in Your Success
www.TedMoreno.com                                                                       
 (626) 826-0612

A Technique to Program Your Mind For Goal Achievement

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In my effort to provide useful  information to the readers of this blog, let me give you an exercise that I have been using for many years to increase my motivation and to keep me on track to achieve my goals. This is but one example of the kind of tools I give to my clients to help them program their minds for success. Like I said, I use this myself and it really works.

It’s very simple and involves affirmations. Now before you start going on about the Stuart Smalley character on Saturday Night Live, let me assure you that there are many ways to do affirmations and some are more effective than others.

First, pick a goal that you want to achieve and decide what  the actions are that you need to be taking now to achieve the goal. For example, say you like to ride road bikes and you want to do your first century (100 miles) event. Of course, you need to be realistic. If you have not ridden more than 5 miles ever and the event is 30 days away, well, sorry but, it ain’t gonna happen.

ettriders

Next, what are the things you need to be doing daily to achieve your goal of riding in your first 100 mile ride in a time that gets you to the finish line before dark? Well, obviously, you need to  be riding everyday or almost every day. What you want to do is to craft an affirmation that is specific and relevant. “I’m riding my bike every day” would not be as good as “I am riding my bike at least 30 miles daily and at least 60 miles on the weekends. Then, come up with two or three more that support your goal. How about “I am eating the right foods that give me energy and stamina when I train.” or I’m enjoying the feeling of getting stronger and more conditioned each time I ride.” You get the picture.

This is what you do next. Write the affirmations down so that you have them exactly how you like them. Then, within half an hour before bed time and within half an hour of waking up, hand-write them once each. It must be handwriting.It doesn’t matter how crappy your handwriting looks, printing is not near as effective.  Now say the affirmation out loud while reading it so that you involve the sense of sight and hearing in addition to the physical (kinesthetic) process of writing them. Then picture in your mind, for just a few seconds, yourself doing the behavior you want to do.

Do the affirmations at night and in the morning for 30 days before you change them. Make sure you frame the affirmations in the positive as opposed to the negative. You don’t want  “I am not sitting in front of the TV eating Cheetos when I should be training on my bike.” Start with “I am..” or “I am becoming..” or “I have… etc.

Why handwriting? Why the half hour before bedtime? You can get the answer by watching this video,  (which I highly recommend) or you can wait until my next post.

Have an awesome week,

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks.

Tman

 Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
Specializing in Your Success
www.TedMoreno.com                                                                       
 (626) 826-0612