A Technique for Creating Immediate Calm and Relaxation

 

Water lilies

If you are close to my age (I was born 12 days after the 60s started) you may remember a bit by the Three Stooges called Niagara Falls. Every time Moe hears the word Niagara Falls, he goes into a rant about his girl running off on him and beats up on Curly.

This is a humorous example of a trigger –  something that happens that makes us feel an emotion or exhibit a behavior. There are positive triggers and negative triggers depending on how they make us feel.

An example of a positive trigger for me would be the smell of a gardenia. When I smell a gardenia I think of pleasant memories from childhood: playing in the sprinkler on a hot summer day in our back ward where  gardenias bloomed.

A negative trigger would be when you look in your rear view mirror and see a police car with flashing lights. Makes me feel yucky thinking about it.

Unfortunately, many of us have negative triggers that are much more frequent than seeing a police car in your rear view mirror. Common examples are a supervisor or boss, a fellow employee, a phone call or even a discussion about a particular subject with a particular person. This is an example of conditioned response; something happens, and before we know it we are angry or irritated, sad or blue, uncomfortable or anxious.

I’d like to share a very simple technique that I use with just about every client to help them deal with those common everyday negative triggers. I call this technique anchoring, or using an anchor.

Thinking about the common usage of the word anchor, think of a ship in a harbor.  If a big storm or hurricane came along, you would want to have your ship’s anchor dropped to prevent you from being blown out to sea, capsized, or smashed on the rocks. In the same way, a positive anchor keeps you calm and in control when the storms of life come along as they inevitably do. A positive anchor is simply a positive trigger. I’m going to show you how to create a physical anchor.

Here’s what you do:

  1. Sit  or lie down in a comfortable position, take a few deep breaths, and allow yourself to get centered and grounded. Take your shoes off and loosen and tight clothing. Do this at a time when you are NOT being negatively triggered, but are feeling neutral,  or relaxed and calm.
  2. Taking just a minute or two, focus on your body with the aim of releasing tension and stress in your body. Begin by taking a few deep breaths. Focus on your feet first, and notice any sensations or feelings that are pleasant in your feet. You might feel tingling, warmth, coolness, whatever. Just make sure it’s a comfortable or at least neutral sensation.
  3. Tell yourself, either in your mind or out loud “This tingly feeling/sensation (or whatever feeling you feel) is relaxing me more and more with every breath I take. I feel this relaxation moving into my heels and my ankles.” Continue to focus on each body part, relaxing the body part by part. This can be done in one to three minutes, or if you are a person who is wound pretty tight, it might take five minutes.
  4. After relaxing your body, imagine, pretend, visualize or remember a place that you have been to, seen photos of, or perhaps can just create in your mind, that is the most relaxing place you can think of to be. Common examples are the beach, the mountains, a lake, a garden or even your backyard or some place in your house. The idea is to see if you can bring up the same feelings of calm, relaxation, peace, serenity, comfort etc. that you would feel if you were really there. Try to imagine what you would see, hear, smell, taste if you were in that place. Imagine laying down, sitting or standing. (note: some people aren’t great at visualizing. Instead, try to get a sense of, feeling of, or memory of what it would be like to be at this peaceful place. Try to get in touch as much as possible with the positive feelings, that’s  what is important.
  5. Now do something physical. I teach my clients to rub their thumb against the first two fingers of their dominant hand (or use both hands.) Some people just touch them together.  This is discreet and can be done, for example,  in front of a person that is negatively triggering you.
  6. While doing the physical anchor, take three deep breaths. On the exhalation of each breath, say a word or mantra or affirmation that will support you in feeling how you want to feel. For example, you might say to yourself “I am calm” or “Relax” or “Peace.” Whatever works for you, keep it short and simple.
  7. For about 30 seconds or so, just imagine you’re in your peaceful place, while rubbing your fingers together to anchor the positive feelings into your body.

To summarize, First get yourself comfortable, centered and grounded, breathing deeply, and relaxing the body, then imagine a “special place”, using all the senses to get connected to being there, especially positive feelings, then do something physical with the body to anchor the feelings into your body while breathing deeply with a positive affirmation on the exhale. The whole thing should not take more than 5 minutes, ten at the max.

The next time you feel yourself being triggered by a certain negative situation or person, rub the fingers together, take three deep breaths and say out loud or in your mind your phrase. You will feel different immediately. This works for most people, but not all.

I usually do this type on anchoring while my client is in hypnosis so it that it takes effect right away. I would do it three times in a week just to make sure. The key is to feel the positive emotions while doing the physical anchor anchor with the breathing and affirmations.

Questions? Email me or use the comment section below.

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks using the buttons below.

Your companion on the path to transformation,

Ted A. Moreno

Certified Hypnotherapist
Success Performance Coach

How to Release Negative Emotions Quickly and Easily

In an hour hypnosis session, the hypnosis part is only about 20 minutes. The remainder of the time I’m talking with my client, getting information, setting goals, and teaching them various techniques to add to their transformation toolbox.

One of the most valuable tools that I teach almost every client is EFT, which stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. EFT is in my experience  quite effective for quickly letting go of negative emotions such as fear, anxiety, anger, and sadness. It can also be used for physical problems as well.

In this short video I teach how to do EFT. It’s simple, easy and effective. To learn more about EFT go to www.emofree.com.

 

7 Things to Do to Have a More Peaceful Holiday Season.

I find it ironic that that during the holiday season the word peace is often used, but for many of us, this is the most hectic and stressful time of year.  In addition to life becoming very busy with shopping, parties, and events, it is also a time when emotions can be close to the surface. Many recall and feel the loss of loved ones more acutely at this time, and many people feel loneliness and alienation, regret or resentment. 

Our quest for personal transformation involves releasing old patterns that we habitually engage in during the holiday season that no longer work for us, and creating a new relationship with this time of year that allows us to have the experiences that we desire, whatever those might be.  I’m focusing on peace because I rarely hear people say “I’m much too peaceful this time of year.”

If you roll just fine with the holiday season, loving every minute of it, no need to read further. If, however, you feel you could and would like to have a more peaceful experience at the end of the year, then read on.
Read more

How to Be Peaceful

greenpeace

Peace. In the media you will hear that word almost daily. Peace talks. Peace in the Middle East. The peace process. Peace activists. Nobel Peace Prize. Peace of mind. Peace and quiet.

Most people want and strive for peace. Yet, peace seems in  short supply these days. Why is peace so rare in our lives, as well as in the world at large? Sometimes it appears that long lasting peace is almost impossible. Granted, there exists an abundance of beauty and harmony, and even though it may not seem like it, the vast majority of the world is not at war (at least not in political wars.) In spite of that, we must acknowledge that as a race, we have a long and bloody history of violence, murder, war, and genocide. I think we can agree that we can do better. Read more

Ted in His Jammies Talking about RELAXATION.

Do you want to be productive, happy and healthy? Do you want to feel good while working or playing? Then you must take time to relax. Relaxation is the release of tension, and the return to equilibrium. Sleeping is part of relaxing but your sleep could  suffer if you don’t take periods of down time during the day. Relaxation involves the conscious choice to release tension that comes from emotions such as fear, anger and anxiety.

Taking time to relax may involve:

  • regular breaks at work
  • vacation time
  • naps during the day
  • any activity that takes your mind off of problems and challenges such as reading, watching tv or listening to soothing music
  • art: music, drawing, painting, singing, dancing
  • low stress exercise such as walking
  • mindfulness techniques such as yoga, meditation, chi gong, tai chi.
  • eating mindfully

You may have some tapes or “programming” in your head that says that you should never relax and that you should always be productive. How is that working for you?

Night moves into day. Warm moves to cold. There is growth, then hibernation. Activity and rest is the natural order of things. You are part of that natural order. Give yourself a break if you are not in the habit of doing so.

One 20 minute hypnotherapy session can be like a three hour refreshing nap. If you have trouble relaxing and it’s taking it’s toll on your health or sanity, give me a call or use the contact Ted tab.

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks.  

Your companion on the journey to transformation,

TMan

Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
www.TedMoreno.com

FEEL FREE TO — USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE, WEB SITE OR BLOG. Just let me know that you are, and include the following with it:

Ted A. Moreno is a Certified Hypnotherapist and Success Performance Coach. Ted empowers his clients to transform their lives by helping them reach their goals of success, abundance, personal development, health and happiness. To learn more, visit www.TedMoreno.com/blog

 

Scatpooy Epidemic

NosferatuShadow

SCATPOOY seems to be present in quite a few people these days. Although not quite an epidemic, you want to make sure you don’t catch it.  The best thing to do is to immunize yourself now. However, if you notice any symptoms, you’ll want to deal with them immediately.

Symptoms may include paralysis, insomnia, and loose bowels, but will always include overwhelming  worry, fear and anxiety.

SCATPOOY (SCAring The Poop Out Of Yourself) won’t kill you, but if left untreated, it can cripple you by leaving you overwhelmed, fearful, and hiding out in the bathroom or stuck in bed.

I experienced this debilitating disease myself, shortly after I bought my house in the middle of the recession in 2009. My business was really slow. Like a parasite, a scary thought started to bore through my brain. It went like this: “I’m going to lose my house and I just bought it.” This thought grew in intensity and fear as I continued to feed the virus with negative scenarios, such as imagining me and my wife packing up our stuff and moving back into an apartment, feeling ashamed and embarrassed.

I found myself expecting something bad to happen. Because of the negative vibes I was sending out, my business phone stopped ringing almost completely, which made the situation worse. I was nervous as a snail crossing the highway.

One night I was lying in bed freaking out, thinking about all the past pickles I’d found myself in. It then occured to me that I had been in situations much more dire, and had managed to make it through.  I’d never been homeless, always had enough to eat, and always had people willing to help me out.  I realized that I had been creating frightening images that had not taken place. Yes, I had been infected with SCATPOOY.  I was scaring the crap out of myself.

I knew immediately where I had been infected, so I stopped watching and listening to the news about everybody losing their homes. It’s not that I didn’t care, I just didn’t need to hear all the sad stories. I needed to take action and make sure that that didn’t happen to me. That night, I swore an oath: “This is our house, and here we will stay.”

The truth was, I was not even close to losing my house. Yet, I was acting as if it was already happening. That night, I stopped focusing on what I didn’t want, and started to focus and think about what I did want.

It’s good to be concerned, and to plan for eventualities. It’s smart to see the writing on the wall and be prepared with a contingency plan. It’s another thing entirely to create fear and worry over something that doesn’t exist or that hasn’t happened yet. That’s called Scaring The Poop Out of Yourself, and it will not help you. If you feel that you have some symptoms of this malady, then you need to start now to cure yourself.

First of all, remove yourself from possible sources of infection: the negative news, negative people who get off on Scaring The Poop Out Of You, and information that only gives you the worse case scenario instead of what actions you can take.

Second, try to see reality clearly. SCATPOOY can cloud your vision. Try to see what’s happening now, instead of the disaster that you think will happen. Then deal with what is in front of you; it’s probably not as bad as the horror film in your head.

Next, change your language. In the cold fever of fear, what are you deliriously babbling about to yourself? Does it sound like “Oh my god, I just know that this is going to be terrible?” Take a chill pill, then stop and ask yourself: “How do I know that? Can I predict the future? I don’t know that it’s going to be terrible.” Even if it has been that way before, the past does not have to equal the future.

Be sure of the cure. Get clear about the outcome you want. Create it in your mind along with all the feelings that will come from having it. Start to shift your focus away from your symptoms and onto wellness. Use positive affirmations such as “I’m going to be OK.”

Write yourself a prescription. Determine what actions you can take now to prepare, remedy, or plan for the situation that’s worrying you. Realize that for every problem, there is a solution. It may not be the ideal solution, but try something. Doing nothing leaves you even more paralyzed.

Trust in your ability to overcome the infection of fear.  I can assure you of this: you have no idea how resilient you can be. Sometimes we need to be put to the test to force us to reach deep down inside for courage, resourcefullness and plain ole grit. Tell yourself, “I’m up for this challenge, it may not go my way but I won’t let it take me down.”

Lastly, immunize yourself. Vaccinate your brain with daily positive affirmations. Supplement with mind vitamins from those who have overcome major challenges and have left a record of their experiences. Have a support team of positive spin doctors give you daily doses of inspiration. Exercise your right to choose and control your thoughts and create your own reality.

SCATPOOY may be a chronic condition that you’ve been living with for some time, or it may be a new condition caused by the stress of something happening in your life that is out of your comfort zone. Which ever it is, don’t beat yourself up. Like they say, poop happens. Just come on out of the bathroom or out from under the covers and give me a call, I can help.

Next month we’ll discuss a condition many people suffer from that is the opposite of  SCATPOOY. It’s known as NCI-Burp. (Negative Crap Inside- Building Up and Ready to Pop) I hope you don’t have it…

If you liked this post, please leave a comment and/or share it with your social networks.  

Your companion on the journey to transformation,

TMan

Ted A. Moreno
Personal/Small Business Coach
Certified Hypnotherapist
www.TedMoreno.com

FEEL FREE TO — USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE, WEB SITE OR BLOG. Just let me know that you are, and include the following with it:

Ted A. Moreno is a Certified Hypnotherapist and Success Performance Coach. Ted empowers his clients to transform their lives by helping them reach their goals of success, abundance, personal development, health and happiness. To learn more, visit www.TedMoreno.com/blog

 

25 Wonderful Things To Do First Thing in the Morning

First thing in the morning

I believe that what you do first thing in the morning will determine how the rest of the day goes.  For the first half hour after you wake up, you’re are in a state of hypnosis, so what you do gets impressed upon your mind and has an effect on your day.

Here’s some ideas for starting your day in a powerful way. Pick one or two that you think will work for you and try them out. You won’t believe the difference it makes when you choose what you’re going to do first thing in the morning.

  1. Get up earlier. Getting up earlier gives you more day and  more peace and quiet. You also give yourself  more time to do some of the things you want to do. Start by setting your alarm 15 minutes earlier. Then, drink a big glass of water.
  2. Have a daily ritual that creates awareness, peace and serenity. NOT watching/ listening to the news, reading the paper or Facebook. Pick a few things from this list and put them together to create your own ritual that you do first thing in the morning.
  3. Make your first thought of the day a positive thought. The night before, write down the positive thought that you want to have as the first thought of the day. “It’s going to be a good day!” or “Glad I’m alive!” or maybe a gratitude list. I have a list of affirmations that I read to focus my mind on what I want to create.
  4. Create your day. I got this from Dr. Joe Dispenza who was in the film “What The Bleep Do We Know!? Create your day first thing in the morning or the night before by imagining how you want your day to be. Say to yourself: “Today I will experience inspiration (or relaxation fun, etc.).  Today I will attract things that  inspire me. When they happen I will know that I created it.”  Believe you can affect the universe.
  5. Read and visualize your goals. Your mind cannot distinguish between what is real and what is vividly imagined. The mind likes and moves toward what is known. Get your mind comfortable with your goals first thing in the morning by closing your eyes and seeing yourself doing what you want to do, having what you want to have and being who you want to be.
  6. Pray or meditate. Get in touch with the Infinite, whatever you consider that to be. It could be as simple as sitting in a chair and breathing, or in a lotus position or on your knees. Use a candle, beads, rosary,  incense or chanting. Take time to inquire within.
  7. Go outside. Let the sun shine it’s rays upon you. Breathe in the fresh morning air. Walk barefoot through the grass. Drink your coffee,  and eat your breakfast outside. If you do yoga in the living room floor, do it outside.
  8. Do something in the garden. Water, weed, plant or harvest. Pick a tomato or a bunch of flowers for a vase. Or just sit there in amazement and wonder.
  9. Do yoga or stretch. A flexible body means a flexible mind. You don’t want hardening of the attitudes. Stretching releases tension and toxins, and gets you in touch with your body.
  10. Read something inspiring. Religious books, your favorite inspirational authors, self help books, or a short quote to ponder for the day.
  11. Listen to music. Music stimulates the brain and awakens the emotions. Whatever makes you feel good, listen to it first thing in the morning.
  12. Write in your journal. Keep it positive. What have you learned recently? What is good in your life? Write a Gratitude list. Or, just quiet your mind and let it tell you what to write.
  13. Take a walk. Greet the world as it awakes while moving your body. Breathe deeply. Walk to Starbucks to get you out the door. Walk to someplace beautiful if possible. Walk the dog.
  14. Ride a bike. There’s something about riding a bike that is freeing and joyful. Maybe ’cause you did it as a kid.
  15. Get some exercise. Exercising first thing in the morning jump starts your metabolism, giving you a sense of relaxed energy. It could be walking, lifting weights, Pilates, going to the gym, push ups and/or pull ups. Make it work for you. I’ll repeat that: Make it work for you.
  16. Look at beautiful images. Fill your mind with beauty. Perhaps you have photos, or a great garden, or a picture book with incredible images. Give yourself a few minutes to take in the good stuff.
  17. Do the magic that you do. If you are a writer, write. If you are a painter, paint. If you are a musician, make music. If you’re a singer, sing. If you are a dancer, dance. If you are a photographer…
  18. Write a letter to someone you haven’t contacted for a while. Just say hi.
  19. Call someone you’ve been meaning to call or haven’t talked to in a while. “Hi, I know it’s first thing in the morning, and you’re probably getting ready for (work, school) but I just wanted to say that I really (miss you, love you, am thinking about you, remembering the good times, want to apologize, etc.) That’s all! Bye!”
  20. Treat yourself to breakfast. If you usually fix your own stuff, go out and eat, connect with the world.
  21. Fix your own breakfast. If you usually go out, then nurture yourself by feeding your own sweet self.
  22. Make a donation.Write a check or go online. Make your first act of the day one of generosity.
  23. Get in bed with your kids and smooch on them. I do this every morning.
  24. Wear something that’s comfortable that makes you feel good. Get it ready the night before ( ironing it or washing it).
  25. Call in well. Instead of calling in sick, call in well. Say  “Hi, I’m feeling too good to go to work today. Think I”ll hang out in the Rose Garden at the Huntington instead. See you tomorrow.” Or call in sick for a mental health day. Take the day off, you deserve it!

Step out of the insanity of the daily grind by getting in touch with what is true and meaningful on a daily basis. Making a “first thing in the morning habit” out of just of few of these things can change your life.

If you need help getting up earlier, or with a better attitude,  contact me and let’s talk about what we can do to help you start your day in a better way.  

Ted A. Moreno

FEEL FREE TO — USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE, WEB SITE OR BLOG. Just let me know, and include the following:
Ted A. Moreno is a Certified Hypnotherapist and Success Performance Coach. Ted helps his clients transform their lives by and reach their goals of success, abundance, personal development, health and happiness. To learn more, visit www.TedMoreno.com/blog

Revisiting Toads and Deep Relaxation

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Spadefoot Toad

 

This post was originally published in June 2009. The recent rain reminded me of it. I’ved added a current special offer at the end.

I was thinking about toads as I fell asleep the other night.  Spadefoot toads to be exact. You may be thinking: what do toads have to do with deep relaxation? Well, it started with the weather. Read more

Maybe Everything That Dies, Someday Comes Back.

potential_e

I remember the day I got sent home from a job for being a lousy salesperson. It was 1986 and I had a sales job in Phoenix. I was general manager of the business and I was doing pretty good, although I was working  7 days a week, 12 to 13 hours a day.

I went into a sales slump. All of a sudden Read more

Are You A DIY? Attend my Self Hypnosis Class Starting 10/23 at PCC

 

If you are a DIY (Do It Yourselfer) then you might be interested in taking my Self Hypnosis for Success Class at PCC starting October 23rd and continuing for the next three Saturdays: October 30th and November 6th from 9 am to 10:30 am. Click here to register!

All hypnosis is self hypnosis, so in this class you’ll learn to use this valuable tool to address a variety of concerns including: overcoming bad habits such as procrastination, gaining confidence, increasing motivation, releasing limiting beliefs and business success. We’ll cover what hypnosis is and isn’t, how to do a hypnotic induction on yourself, crafting suggestions and how to put it all together to reprogram your subconsious mind for success in just a few minutes a day.

You’ll receive a course syllabus as well as my Guide to Self Hypnosis and my Self Hypnosis Conditioning CD, which also includes my studio produced “Peaceful Place” relaxation track as an added bonus.

This will be the third time I’m offering this class, and so far I’ve recieved great response. Here are some comments from the course evaluations I received from the  class held in January 2010:

  • Ted is very knowledgable and enthusiastic about his field. It really helped me a lot.”
  • “It actually works!”
  • “Professional, organized and informative. The instructor was engaging and knew his subject well. I’m glad I took the course!”
  • “Clear and easy guidelines to follow. Instructor is knowledgable and well experienced.”
  • “Ted is dynamic and makes an effort to engage the students. The content was well delivered.”

Remember, you’re being hypnotized daily, through advertising, the media, and the people you spend time with. In addition, you’ve been hypnotized throughout your life to believe things about yourself and the world that may or may not work for you anymore. The good news is, you can take control of your own positive programming. If you have habits of thinking and behaving that are holding you back from the success and happiness that you want, then you can learn to use the power of your own mind to change. Click here to register!

If you’re not interested in learning self-hypnosis but believe that hypnosis can be of help to you, give me a call and I’ll give you a free half hour consultation to discuss how you can benefit from working with me as your hypnotherapist or personal/small business coach. Call (626) 826-0612, email [email protected] or click here.

A subconscious mind is a terrible thing to waste! Put it to work for you with self hypnosis. Click here to register.